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June 27, 2007

2. The Heart Types

ME Liz Strauss wrote this at 5:00 pm

Enneagram Series by Mark McGuinness

Having introduced the Enneagram system of personality types in my last post, I’ll now start to describe the individual Enneagram types.

The minimum you need to know about the Enneagram symbol is that it is divided into three parts, representing the three ‘centres’ or types of intelligence in human beings - emotional, mental and physical. Another way of looking at the three centres is to see them as corresponding to different types of action - relating, thinking and doing.

basic-enneagram-groups


In this post I will outline the three ‘Heart’ types - Two, Three and Four. These types’ strength lies in their emotional intelligence - their ability to relate to others and their own emotions.

It’s important to remember that no types are better or worse than the others. Each type has strengths and weaknesses, opportunities and obstacles. And the Enneagram is not about putting people in boxes - we all have the potential to occupy any position on the Enneagram, and in different situations we can take on the characteristics of any of the nine types.

N.B. The names of the Enneagram types given here are not definitive - different teachers use different names, and some just refer to the types by number.

Enneagram The Heart Types


Type Two - The Helper

Type Two is skilled at reading others’ emotions in order to understand and meet their needs. Twos take their identity from their ability to help others. Generous to a fault, they can be relied up to step forward and take care of others when needed. Their giving can take many forms - time, attention, energy, experience, influence or money. Problems can arise when they start to give in order to receive something in return - whether material or emotional.

The stereotype of the Two is the kindly old grandmother or self-sacrificing carer, but Twos can also take on the role of the ‘power behind the throne’ of an influential person.

At their best Twos understand the joy of service. They are happy to give without seeking a reward in return, since making a difference to another’s life is what brings them pleasure. They find fulfilment in the act of giving, without clinging to the image of the ‘generous person’. There is nothing neurotic in their generosity, since they are wise enough to balance what they give to others with taking care of their own needs.

At their worst Giving becomes a form of manipulation, of making others feel indebted to them and returning the ‘favour’. Unable to acknowledge their own needs directly, they use emotional pressure to meet them indirectly, often without realising what they are doing. It is not enough for them to help someone else - they crave praise for their generosity and want to be recognised as a ‘special’ indispensable person. If they do not get this, they can criticise other and complain of their ‘ingratitude’. The dark side of the Helper is the self-appointed Martyr.

We all experience point Two any time we help someone else and experience the pleasure of seeing their face light up with happiness - and maybe a twinge of anticipation to see whether they have noticed our generosity?

Type Three - The Performer

Type Three is skilled at reading others’ emotions in order to influence them. Threes take their identity from their ability to win praise and recognition from large numbers of people, or of the most influential people. Because they always have one eye on the public perception of their actions, they become consummate performers at whatever they choose to focus on. Problems can arise when they become so attached to their public persona that they lose touch with their own real feelings and start to deceive both themselves and others.

The stereotype of the Three is the actor, showbiz performer or politician, but they can be found in almost any walk of life - such as the highest-profile manager, doctor, writer, salesperson or fitness instructor.

At their best Threes are the embodiment of excellence. They deliver a wonderful performance in every sense, and their impressive style is backed up by substantial achievement. They experience joy in the performance itself, without undue concern for their public image. They are able to distinguish between reality and illusion, and to balance public adulation with awareness of their own feelings and honest acceptance of their shortcomings.

At their worst Threes are addicted to the limelight and will stop at nothing to bolster their self-image. Cut off from their true feelings, they cling to the external trappings of success and are ruthless with anyone who threatens their position, sometimes resorting to underhand methods to discredit them. To others they look deceptive - all ‘spin’ and no substance - but they have been believing their own press for so long that they hardly notice the deception. The dark side of the consummate Performer is the plausible Liar.

We all experience point Three any time we perform a task particularly well and receive praise and recognition - and maybe the temptation to play to the crowd and bask in the limelight?

Type Four - The Romantic

Type Fours are highly sensitive to their own emotions, able to introspect deeply and to express these feelings in original ways. Fours take their identity from their sense of being true to themselves and following their own path in life, whatever the prevailing wisdom or fashion. Because of their ability to tap deep wells of emotion, they can create powerful works of art or take unusual and memorable paths through life. Problems arise when their introspection tips over into self-absorption and they start to lose touch with the realities of life around them, including the feelings of others.

The stereotype of the Four is the Romantic artist or poet, but their originality is not always expressed through artistic channels - they can be the black sheep or dark horse with a distinctive approach to any profession or life situation.

At their best Fours can inspire others with their originality and bring a magical, almost otherworldly quality to whatever they do. Whether artists or not, in their work they create something striking and meaningful that resonates deeply with those whom it touches. Instead of being attached to their own feelings, they take pleasure in expressing them and touching others’ hearts. They are able to balance self-awareness with a healthy respect for others’ feelings and the reality of the world around them.

At their worst they become so absorbed in their inner world that they lose touch with reality and become self-obsessed. Melancholy - never far away - turns into depression and they wallow in negative feelings. They become bitter against a world that ‘doesn’t understand’ them and angrily reject suggestions that they need to take their head out of the clouds and deal with the realities of life. Others see them as self-indulgent and start to lose patience with their negativity. The dark side of the Romantic is the neurotic Depressive.

We all experience point Four when we feel something so strongly that we have a vivid sense of the beauty and preciousness of life, so that no force on earth will persuade us to go against our true feelings - and maybe the temptation to milk the feeling for all its worth?

Questions

  • Do you recognize yourself in any of these descriptions?
  • Supposing you met someone who seemed to be at point Two, Three or Four - how could you ‘speak their language’ to make them feel at ease and relate to them on their own terms?

Part 3 in Enneagram — a Brief Introduction, The Head Types, will appear Thursday at about this same time.

_____________
Mark studied the Enneagram as part of his training as a psychotherapist. He has used it for his own personal development and in his work with individuals, families, and organizations. Mark McGuinness’ business Wishful Thinking, is a specialist coaching and training service for creative businesses such as design studios, ad agencies, film and TV production companies, computer games developers, architect’s practices and fashion designers.

Thank you, Mark,
–ME “Liz” Strauss

Related:
See the complete series listing at Series: The Enneagram – a Brief Introduction

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19 Comments to “2. The Heart Types”

  1. June 28th, 2007 at 4:21 am
    Wishful Thinking » Blog Archive » Enneagram Series - The Heart Types said

    […] The next post in my Introduction to the Enneagram series is up now on Successful Blog - The Heart Types. […]

  2. June 28th, 2007 at 10:47 am
    Jesse Petersen said

    I appear in the Head types. Who’da thunk?

    I’ll leave it a mystery about how my outcome came until you get there. Put the cart before the horse, they say. Oh, no… that’s what I usually do. :)

    Thank you for introducing me to this personality profile.

  3. June 28th, 2007 at 11:07 am
    Series: The Enneagram – a Brief Introduction - Liz Strauss at Successful Blog - Thinking, writing, business ideas . . . You’re only a stranger once. said

    […] Wednesday, June 27: The Heart Types […]

  4. June 28th, 2007 at 5:56 pm
    Chris Owen said

    Hi Liz
    I’m glad you’ve got Mark digging into enneagrams, i haven’t explored this stuff for a while and a refresher is good.
    Thanks
    BTW My recollection was that I was a 3 but a 2 is what sounds like me. Right down the bloody martyrdom which drives my husband and sons crazy.
    The standard line from my husband is:
    (sniffing the air) What’s that smell? Ohh it’s burning flesh!!

  5. June 28th, 2007 at 6:05 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Chris!
    Great to see you! Mark is amazing with his understanding of this stuff. He’s got me nailed on every part. :)

  6. June 29th, 2007 at 3:07 am
    Mark McGuinness said

    Jesse - glad you like it, see you in the Head Types comments…

    Chris - that’s brilliant, love the ‘burning flesh’ line! It’s great if you can make a joke out of the Enneagram type with your loved ones, it can take some of the (ahem) heat out of difficult situations.

  7. June 29th, 2007 at 10:15 am
    Christine Kane said

    my favorite book on the enneagram is “the wisdom of the enneagram” by riso/hudson.. and the thing about it that i love is that it says “this is who you are NOT.” in other words, the enneagram goes beyond a myers-briggs type because you can use it to see through your “fixations” (ie. us fours can believe that each and everyone of our emotions is the TRUTH) and into your essence. and that’s where you can really evolve into a higher place of awareness.

    so, all of that is to say — having a sense of humor about it is SO healthy! at the retreats i facilitate, we focus an afternoon on the enneagram and people just crack up when they get “busted” on their stuff. it’s great! and funny!

  8. June 29th, 2007 at 10:43 am
    ME Strauss said

    Christine,
    I can see your enneagram afternoon in my head. I’m smiling at the thought. :)

  9. June 29th, 2007 at 12:46 pm
    Mark McGuinness said

    Christine - yes! that’s exactly it, the Enneagram type is NOT who you really are - it’s a fixation that gets in the way of Essence. Riso/Hudson really nail it sometimes.

  10. June 29th, 2007 at 11:09 pm
    cat said

    Hmmm … I believe I’m a romantic but I’m willing to take another look as the series unfolds.

  11. June 30th, 2007 at 12:28 am
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Cat!
    I’ll be interested to see what number you finally decide is yours. :)

  12. June 30th, 2007 at 12:39 am
    cat said

    Hey back Liz! I’ll be sure to make a mention of it then :-)

  13. June 30th, 2007 at 1:06 am
    ME Strauss said

    Can’t wait, but I will. :)

  14. June 30th, 2007 at 3:32 am
    Mark McGuinness said

    Hi Cat, good to see you. I’ll be interested to hear what you make of yourself by the end of the series…

  15. June 30th, 2007 at 3:56 am
    cat said

    Hi Mark! Thanks writing this great series. I’ve been reading around a bit and keep bouncing between some of the descriptions. I used to be more of a helper when I was younger. But, I’m also a Romantic. Both are highly sensitive to emotion.

    I’ll wait until the end to figure it out though. Maybe I’ll surprise even myself.

  16. July 2nd, 2007 at 7:03 am
    Mark McGuinness said

    Cat - remember, 2 and 4 are connected, so it’s no surprise you bounce between them. According to the usual description, 2 is supposed to develop towards 4, so at least you’re headed in the ‘right’ direction!

  17. July 2nd, 2007 at 7:42 pm
    cat said

    Mark - So, I’m evolving? I’m an evolution kind of gal so that sounds great to me!

  18. July 3rd, 2007 at 2:50 am
    Mark McGuinness said

    Darwin would be proud of you. :-)

  19. July 3rd, 2007 at 7:01 am
    ME Strauss said

    You guys are so funny! :)

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