Liz Strauss at Successful Blog

Thinking, writing, business ideas … You’re only a stranger once.

July 17, 2007

Change the World: Forget the Kids at School, Say It Out Loud

ME Liz Strauss wrote this at 7:23 am

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We Know, But We Can’t Say It

Change the World!

It’s those words. They sit right up there in our foreheads. They are the important ones. More often than not, they are words kept captive there by a fear we hold dear.

We know what words they are, in our hearts we do. We know what they mean to us. We can’t say them out loud because, then we would hear them and, we might get the kind of response we got once. We know that’s not so, but knowing is one thing that is easier to say, than to do.

About three nights before SOBCon07, nearing midnight I was on the phone with a dear friend. We were talking about the conference, how the event would soon be real.

I called him by name, I said, “I’m afraid.”

As any friend would, he asked what it was making me feel that way. I saw the words, felt the words, knew the answer then. I probably knew the answer for days before this conversation took place. I felt my throat tighten to think of saying the words out loud.

I said, “I know, but let’s talk some more. I can’t tell you right now.”

A while later, the subject came up again in a natural way. I knew it was important that I say the words out loud for someone to hear. I worked my way up to give context, to build courage, to make sure that we both understood. What I said came out something like this. . . .

I’m not afraid that no one will come. I know they will. I’m not afraid that the event will not be successful. It will be an experience that the attendees will never forget. I’m not afraid of the people in the room for whom I will be speaking.

I’m afraid of the kids I went to grade school with.

He wondered what I meant. I laughed and said, “Don’t worry I can handle them.”
He said, “Please explain.” I did.

What I thought was a story that’s so universal. I said, “Remember when some kids at school made you feel small?”

But those kids had shrunk and vanished the minute I let that fear out of my head — when I said it. At that exact second, they were no longer near, they were decades ago. I knew that they had forgotten me, and I could forget about their laughter at my expense. They looked small and young in the distance.

I wish we didn’t hold a fear to say what we know is our truth waiting to be said. “I’m afraid, because of the kids I went to school with.” How silly is that? Boy am I glad that sentence is out of my head.

We hold onto sentences like that. I can’t say out loud who I am, what I’m good at, what I love, where I’m going, what I dream, what I fear, what I need, what I hope, because if I say it out loud I might hear and you might respond like the kids did at school.

Imagine if we choose wisely enough to trust and to talk out loud to folks who can see us.

We can change the world — just like that.
–ME “Liz” Strauss

______________
If you’re ready to change the world, send me your thoughts in a guest post. Feel free to take the gorgeous Change the World image up there that Sandy designed back to your blog. Or help yourself to this one.

Change the World!.

Email me about what you’re doing or what we might do. Let’s change the world one bit at a time together. Together it can’t take forever.





Filed under Motivation/Inspiration, Successful Blog |




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13 Comments to “Change the World: Forget the Kids at School, Say It Out Loud”

  1. July 17th, 2007 at 10:53 am
    Karin H. said

    Imagine if we choose wisely enough to trust and to talk out loud to folks who can see us.

    Leap of faith I call that. Faith in our own grown being. We might fall again, but mostly, because we have learned how to ‘jump’ and to trust the ‘mat’ we land softly.

    Karin H. (Keep It Simple Sweetheart, specially in business)

  2. July 17th, 2007 at 12:30 pm
    Laura Athavale Fitton said

    Oh. My. God.

    Liz, thank you. You have NO idea how much. Thank you.

  3. July 17th, 2007 at 1:35 pm
    Susanna said

    Great post. My husband and I were talking the other day about how, too often, women don’t feel like they are as competent and talented as they really are. It’s scary for me to say “I’m a designer” because I’m afraid someone else out there will call me on it and prove it isn’t so.

    You know, now that I’ve typed that, I see how silly it seems. Who, other than a random troll, is going to try and make me change what I do for a living?

  4. July 17th, 2007 at 1:49 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Karin,
    Sorry the site issues made it hard to get back to you quickly!

    Leap of faith . . . in ourselves. We’re brave enough, good enough, old enough to stand and hold our own. I know we are. :)

  5. July 17th, 2007 at 1:50 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Laura!
    I’m grateful that my night of learning was useful to you. I hear something good and that’s a wonderful sound. :)

  6. July 17th, 2007 at 1:53 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Susanna!
    People ask me how I knew I was a writer. The only answer I can give goes something like this . . . when other folks ideas about what I should do with my work became their ideas and opinions. I knew.

    I think you just found out you’re a designer. :)

  7. July 18th, 2007 at 9:43 am
    Dar said

    Hi, Liz!

    Wow. I had remembered the kids. I’d forgotten the adults… The nun who handed out ‘crooked strokes’ (and I got caught in the crossfire.) The secretarial teacher who yelled at me for daydreaming (even though my work was done.) And the other, well, I need to work on that one — because I CAN! :-)

    Thank you, thank you! (Light bulb moment: Three adults who somehow gave up on themselves — and their dreams? Yep!)

    P.S. Oh, Susanna, I can SO relate. We *are* what we are, even if we’re still works in progress. ;-)

  8. July 18th, 2007 at 1:55 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Dar!
    I so love it to see those light bulbs going on! You’re voice is filled with the light! :)

  9. July 19th, 2007 at 11:45 am
    1.3 If You Don’t Know What You Love Doing . . . - Liz Strauss at Successful Blog - Thinking, writing, business ideas . . . You’re only a stranger once. said

    [...] ‘mon and say it out loud. [...]

  10. July 24th, 2007 at 6:24 am
    "8 Random Things about Me" Bloggy Contest | My Beautiful Chaos said

    [...] I still battle with the mean things kids say. [...]

  11. October 18th, 2007 at 8:10 am
    Whitney Hoffman said

    The trick to letting go of any fear is to recognize it, verbalize it, and realize that once you do that, there’s no power left in it anymore. fear is the unknown, fear is the different, fear is the risk- once you know and accept them, it becomes deal-able.
    That said, sometimes “naming it” isn’t so easy- I am so proud of you- what a great post!

  12. October 18th, 2007 at 10:31 am
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Whitney!
    Thank you! Naming a fear is a big step to facing it down. You betcha. I felt truly good when I heard myself say that.

    :)

  13. December 3rd, 2007 at 11:29 am
    WE meme said

    [...] I still battle with the mean things kids say [...]

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