24 Comments to “Have You Forgotten What Makes You Magical?”

1. December 13th, 2007 at 7:22 am
   Whitney said

   I guess it’s a matter of who your friends are, and how well they’ve known you (or understood you) at any point in time. Some do not make good mirrors.

   I see my progress, my growth, and the times I’ve veered away from or closer to my authenticity most when I’m reconnecting with old classmates. Whose name I’m most delighted to see suddenly appear in my inbox, what memories of them come to mind first, what feelings come to the forefront.

   Strangers are also good mirrors. Just this past weekend I met someone for a networking lunch. Two hours into the conversation, she commented on how big my smile was, how animated I was, when I talked about my part-time teaching career. By contrast, with some other things I talked about, I didn’t crack a smile, didn’t emanate much light. Her observations, and the fact that the differences in my demeanor were so striking that she felt compelled to share what she observed, gave me A LOT to think about that afternoon.

2. December 13th, 2007 at 7:34 am
   Karin H. said

   Hi Liz, Whitney

   “Strangers are mirrors too” - exactly what I was looking for ;-)

   Friends know us and - if we are fortunate enough - notice, follow and see the changes in us before we do. That’s why we need them to hold up our mirror once in a while so we know too.
   Strangers, they ‘only’ see who we have become. The mirror they hold up to us is sometimes more revealing than our friends mirrors.

   I was thinking about this when I realised that with some ’strangers’ you have an instant connection the first time you meet them. Happened to me end of last month - at, how very synchronocity, a network meeting, breakfast in our case. It was as if we knew each other for years, that kind of connection.

   Do these particular ’strangers’ mirror the real ‘unspoiled’ us? Unspoiled as in without former history? As we really have become at this moment?

   Karin H. (Keep It Simple Sweetheart, specially in business)

3. December 13th, 2007 at 7:39 am
   ME Liz Strauss said

   Hi Whitney, Karin!
   Strangers are a mirror of a different kind. They can give pieces of what we are now, but it’s harder for them to do what friends from the past can — reminds us and return things we’ve left behind.

   No question that both are valuable.

   Sometimes it’s good to see who we once were and why we were loved then.

4. December 13th, 2007 at 7:48 am
   Karin H. said

   Hi Liz

   I think I like the interaction between ‘old’ mirror and ‘new’ mirror best: it shows us how far we’ve come and why, also because old and new friends have an influence on us, their reflection integrate somehow in ours to make us (and them) grow.

   Mirror, mirror ;-)

   Karin H.

5. December 13th, 2007 at 7:49 am
   ME Liz Strauss said

   Hi Karin!

   Both mirrors show us things, but the new mirror is everywhere. The old mirror is like old music and old photographs we have to look for it. :)

6. December 13th, 2007 at 9:12 am
   jon said

   I almost wrote directly and then realized that there is a group element to what i’m about to say. For many of us, the old mirrors (as that term has been used above) aren’t all that accurate, for what they are reflecting back is a person that never was. As we’ve only begun to be more authentic, as we’ve begun to accept how we’ve been built, those are reminders of how much we weren’t honest with ourselves then, how we weren’t who people thought we were.

   And then, with some people, particularly family, without hard work we have a tendency to revert to 12 in our interactions. As everyone gets together, we are acting like 12 year olds…and not always in the good sense.

   This is all sad, which isn’t what I felt at all when I read your post. In fact, I love it, love the sense of needing to listen to those with whom we were most honest, most adventurous, most ourselves.

   And I love the sense that we must be willing to stop and listen and reflect and face not only the mirrors, but the person in the mirrors. If we do, we might find that the person isn’t nearly as awful as we think (we are.)

7. December 13th, 2007 at 9:16 am
   ME Liz Strauss said

   Jon,
   Your insights are always a gift. You.

   Yes, indeed I did go back to find some bits of my authentic self, bits I like a lot, that had gotten shuffled aside in the moves around this country. Somehow before I went I knew I would, which is probably exactly why I did. :)

8. December 13th, 2007 at 9:48 am
   Tiffany Monhollon said

   I love the idea that people will bring out what’s magical about us. When I go back and flip through old journals, I get a sense of nostalgia, bittersweet, at pieces of me that are perhaps lost. But when I spend time playing board games with my family over the holidays, I am reminded of the most excellent parts of myself that still are part of myself, but that the business of life causes me to overlook so often.

   And when the power goes out at my house like it did this week in an ice storm and I spend my evenings at the home of my dearest friend, talking, watching her two year old daughter spin and spin and spin and spin, unplugged from my “normal” life, I am inspired not just about who I am, but also about how relationships make me an even better version of myself.

9. December 13th, 2007 at 12:54 pm
   Kusani said

   …thank you for writing this, Liz.

   It’s exactly the good-vibes and the positive thought that I needed after a really crazy morning.

   You guys are wonderful. =)

10. December 13th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
    Joanna Young said

    It’s an interesting question Liz and I recognise what some others have said about people from our past pigeon-holing us or seeing us only in one limited way.

    But your words did have a magical quality to them today, and they threw me back to thinking about people who I haven’t seen for a while, and why they still want and need to see me and me them, and remember that it’s the core of me they know and love, and that the ups and downs, the travails of life that we get so caught up in from day to day and year to year will not matter to them when they and I think back to the way we make each other feel.

    Joanna

    Your writing has been most uplifting since you came back, I think we’ll have to get you over to the UK more often :-)

11. December 13th, 2007 at 1:54 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Kusani!
    You’re welcome. I feel good about what my friends gave me. It was easy to share it. :)

12. December 13th, 2007 at 1:58 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Yes, Joanna!
    Maybe it’s that silver thread that ties us to the people we are meant to know and care about that draws us back together. OR maybe it’s just seeing those folks that reminds us to care for that thread that is fragile and so priceless.

    I found what I was looking for in the the UK. It was a bit of me I left behind in September 2001.

    Thank you for the visit. I will be returning. :)

13. December 13th, 2007 at 3:50 pm
    Joanna Young said

    Liz, I am happy that you found what you were looking for :-)

    Joanna

14. December 13th, 2007 at 3:52 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Yeah, it’s been a journey. But I’m so smiling. :)

15. December 13th, 2007 at 5:37 pm
    Erica Ross-Krieger said

    I’m inspired and smiling at the invitation to join you in this thinking about…

    I am blessed to be in touch with a friend I’ve known since our first day of first grade. We have lived in different places, pursued entirely different careers, each passed different life milestones and yet somehow, through phone calls yearly, email now and then, holiday cards and infrequent but meaningful get-togethers, we manage to keep the slender threads alive.

    This year, we met for lunch, after not having seen each other for 3 years.

    It is always the same. We pick up where we left off, as though it were one continuous conversation.

    It is also always different. We have more laugh lines and strands of silver in our hair, we have shifted who we are due to what we have faced and decided, and we have grown new layers of self.

    I guess it’s a lot like visiting a favorite landmark that is the same year after year and yet different as well. What becomes most apparent is the me that I am now remembering the me that I was and the two of them honoring one another. Rather magical.

    Thanks for the prompt to think it over…

16. December 13th, 2007 at 10:03 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Erica!
    It’s amazing how magical we are for each other and how quickly we forget that. It’s a good thing we’re around to remind us. :)

    You know what I mean. :) :)

17. December 13th, 2007 at 10:57 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Tiffany,
    I’m not sure what happened to your comment, but it just showed up over here. hmmmm

    I’m so glad it did.

    You said it better than I when you said, “I am reminded of the most excellent parts of myself that still are part of myself, but that the business of life causes me to overlook so often.”

    That’s it exactly. :)

18. December 14th, 2007 at 10:38 am
    Tiffany Monhollon said

    I’m glad it showed up, too! I really enjoyed this post - it was right in line with what I’ve been experiencing this week. Thank you for the inspiration!

19. December 14th, 2007 at 10:51 am
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hey Tiffany,
    Thank you!

20. December 15th, 2007 at 3:11 am
    Sueblimely said

    Thanks Liz
    After writing this I writing letters and cards to my closest friends from my childhood in UK. It is 26 years since I left for Australia and I have only seen them 3 of 4 times since. As the years go there is less motivation for me to keep in touch this way. You have reminded me how important it is.

    We have grown and developed and gone our separate ways but the bond is never lost. So much of ourselves was formed during the time we were regularly together during childhood and teenage years, which means when we do meet we still know each other and interact as if it we had never been apart.

21. December 15th, 2007 at 6:46 am
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Sue!
    I know. I know. It’s so easy to let the past good things go fading into history. Yet so much can be shared and learned from keeping those moments alive.

    Our hearts remember what’s priceless about our lives or heads sometimes try to file that away.

    Enjoy the response you get from reaching out again. :)

22. December 15th, 2007 at 1:33 pm
    Freelance Writing Jobs » Blog Archive » Saturday Afternoon Link Love said

    […] Liz Strauss asks, “Have you forgotten what makes you magical?” […]

23. December 31st, 2007 at 9:29 am
    Gail said

    Dear Liz, I won’t even try to describe the the magical path that brought me to your site to read this message today, except to say that it was truly uncanny! It came after a miraculous message from my long dead grandmother reminding me of the delightful child I was in her memory. The world is truly full of miracles patiently waiting for us to take notice! Thank you for being a witness to this unceasing grace. Gail

24. December 31st, 2007 at 6:28 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Gail!
    Welcome!
    I love stories of magic that sound so filled with meaning. To remember your grandmother’s feelings for you must have been magical in itself. I think I could be the lucky one here. :)