February 11, 2008

How to Think a Way Out of a Losing Situation

ME Liz Strauss wrote this at 8:30 am

Stuck and Going Nowhere

Have you done an evaluation of your situation lately? When you think about where you are and were last year, are you gaining ground, losing ground, or standing still?

A small company client was hit hard by the changes that came out of September 11, 2001. Since that time, their business has been stalled or declining. Even they described their situation as “stuck and going nowhere.”

When I started asking about the problem, the answers formed a curious pattern. Reasons they offered included:

Their customer base had dwindled.
The “no call” law on telemarketers had hurt their sales.
Direct mail no longer worked.
They couldn’t get funding because they didn’t have connections.

Do you see the pattern? Every cause — every wall, pothole, and barrier — they offered was something outside of them. Other companies had faced the same things and found solutions, but this company was focused on the causes — they only saw what they couldn’t control.

A fine company and some great managers were stuck for 6 years because they got thinking in the wrong direction. They had painted themselves into a losing situation. Their view was that they were unable to fix their problems.

How to Think a Way Out of a Losing Situation

Not a person, not a business, can get to success without a few failures and losses. It’s the downs that build the skills to keep us climbing upward. At the center of winning is the ability to look at a losing situation and think a way out. Here’s how to do that.

Think back to when you were last winning. How long has it been? What about you or your business was different then? Look for the differences between the you or your business then and now.

Think about the hidden payoffs of losing. If you’re truly stuck and can’t see a way out, you must be getting a hidden reward for being where you are. Is that you’re able to lay down responsibility? Is it that people give you attention? Is it that you don’t have to try winning again? Whatever put you in the situation, you’re the reason that you’re still there.

Think away from the center. Get some perspective. You’re not the first or the only to have been there. Thinking you are keeps you focused on the wrong things.

Think yourself out of the fairy tale you’ve bought into. Are you waiting for a knight, a mentor, a patron to fix it? Needing help and waiting for someone to rescue you won’t change where you are. Knights, mentors, and patrons are attracted to people who show signs of winning.

Think about a far off future unchanged. If that doesn’t motivate you to find a new answer, maybe you like where you are.

Think up one small positive action. Then MAKE IT HAPPEN.

Walls, barriers, and potholes don’t stand a chance of holding back a winner.

Can you think your way out of a losing situation?

Of course you can.
–ME “Liz” Strauss
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Filed under Inside-Out Thinking, Motivation/Inspiration, Successful Blog | 35 Comments »

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35 Comments to “How to Think a Way Out of a Losing Situation”

February 11th, 2008 at 9:01 am
Mike DeWitt said
Hi Liz,

Great list! I especially like #3, because it’s true that every problem has already been solved by one or more people.

Mike

P.S. #2 is painful to think about, but you’re right to mention it.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:35 am
Kristi Holl said
So often the problem is that our solution (or goal) is tied up with someone else. We tend to make goals like “I will have a great marriage” that depend on your spouse as well as yourself to make an effort. Built-in frustration from the start! If we’d learn to always make our goals ones that we have control over (e.g. “I will be a great wife”), then we’re miles ahead in finding solutions to things. My goal of “I will sell a mystery series this year” will be frustrating since it depends on publishers, but “I will work three hours per day on my series idea and send it out again and again” is something I can accomplish without help from anyone or needing a specific outcome from anyone else. Our goals need to be OUR goals alone, and they often provide useful solutions to problems.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:40 am
Mike DeWitt said
A most excellent point, Kristi!
February 11th, 2008 at 9:44 am
Karin H. said
Nice one Liz.

As Mike I agree that #2 is painful, but as with so many other ‘issues’ it’s the way of the least resistance to think like that: you don’t have to change when you hang-on to this and we all know change is scary!

I especially like #6: change for the better (well, any change is better than doing nothing) starts with tiny little steps. But even the tiniest step is movement

Since the media is selling us a recession at the moment, steps to keep going are very important, even the tiniest ones like telling your clients there isn’t really a recession – not in your trade anyway
(That’ll make ‘m think, I’ve seen it happen)

Karin H. (Keep It Simple Sweetheart, specially in business)
February 11th, 2008 at 9:56 am
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Mike!
I know. Number 2 is a killer. But there has to be a reason that we’re staying somewhere we say we don’t want to me.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:59 am
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Kristi,
Brilliant point. Keeping an eye on what we’re in charge of sure can make a difference in how well we move forward. Independence means doing it ourselves.
February 11th, 2008 at 10:03 am
ME Liz Strauss said
Yep, Karin!
Change is the ultimate risk. But staying still ensures stagnation. I like number 6 too.

A single, small positive act can spark a reinforcing response that leads to another positive action.
February 11th, 2008 at 11:34 am
Janice C Cartier said
Hi guys,
Good and timely post. I spent some of the weekend reviewing my Critical Mass outline which, yes is something I do every so often in reviews with all the other stuff… One of the most important tasks at hand at the moment is “letting go” of some of my private work and offering it up, as well as “opening up” to more experimental mid range offerings from the studio.
You cannot see the rise in my pulse or or the big gulp psychologically this entails, but it is there.
Being willing to risk an inside look at work in progress, or experimental media that is usually reserved for workshop, private studio, and my eyes only, or the eyes of a trusted few, falls into many of the points you list. ESPECIALLY, well all of them!
But, and I may be wrong here, I am willing to test it. One of the things that always intrigued my clients and visitors to my former studio is the how, the story, what are you up to now? Well the studio that was is gone, but I am not.
So instead of relying solely on the big stuff and the high ticket work that nobody, well except a few, sees until I am ready to show it, I am changing the breadth of what I am actually letting “out there”.
That required a big flip in my thinking…and the willingness to bet on myself in a bit of unknown territory.
Gulp. Being safe is a good thing for awhile, but at some point one has to let go the shore and sail again. Else where’s the fun and the life? You see my goal is very important to me. Does this get me closer? I am thinking yes. AM I a bit nervous? Oh way yes. Is it going to be fun. You bet.
I apologize for the length of the comment, but maybe you all can share a bit of your leaps of faith too…or a tweak ? That worked, or one where you absolutely fell on your ass but you learned what not to do too.
All best, Jan
February 11th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Jan,
That’s just it. We can live planning the future . . . and never get there. OR we can look at where we are and move forward as if we are already there. The decision to leave things behind is just that, a decision. Sounds like you made it already . . . anticipation and nervousness often feel like the same thing.
February 11th, 2008 at 3:42 pm
Mother Earth said
in our work we review monthly – january was rockin. What I find is if certain tried and true methods really foster sales, great attitude and such then don’t rock that boat -keep doing what works. What I am personally dealing with is going out there and doing uncomfortable things or new things I have never done before, with no real hindsight yet and with that feeling of gee this was really not fun or very comfortable for me, I have to perservere – message being: give something new in your business a chance
February 11th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Mother Earth!
I agree. It’s a good thing to stick with what works and change what isn’t. Uncomfortable things are a stretch, but staying where we’re miserable isn’t living.

You’re proof of what one can do if she sets her mind in the right direction.
February 11th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
Glenda Watson Hyatt said
Great post, Liz, and timely!

Without saying too much publicly, I’m facing an encounter on Friday that will likely label me as “unemployable”. Yet, my two year goal is to be “financially sufficient”. I don’t have the exact “how” worked out yet, BUT in the past week a few small opportunities have presented themselves. Enough of these small opportunities on a consistent basis will get me to my two year goal and beyond.

It comes down be determined, persistent, creative [and perhaps somewhat stubborn!] to unstick yourself even when others label you as stuck, a failure or unemployable!
February 11th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Glenda!
I’m thinking that whomever you’re meeting better be prepared for a winner to roll through that door.
February 11th, 2008 at 6:48 pm
RayD said
How about: “working backward from where you want to be”? Picture the situation where you want to be in as vivid as you can. As if you’re already there. And then “remember” the step you took before that. And the one before that. I tried this on a number of occasions and what usually happens is that I get a myriad of ideas to get moving again. Maybe a bit “out there”, but quite powerful in my experience.

BUT: Kristi already mentioned that your goals should be self-controlled. It’s exactly the same with “imagined memories”. Make sure they’re your ‘actions’. And then use Liz’ #6 of course, otherwise you’re only day-dreaming.
February 11th, 2008 at 6:57 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Ray D!
That’s a great strategy. I know I use it often. It gets me focused out and away from the “here and now.”

Dreams into action!
February 11th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
Janice C Cartier said
Interesting. Ingmar Berman used to say that in making movies he would throw a spear” out there” where he wanted to be, and then figure out how to get to the spear… not whether he could or not.
@ Ray D- I like that idea. Working backwards. I had forgotten about it.
There was a baseball movie a few years back where a B league player was upped to the A leagues. Advice from his coach, play like you belong there. Pretty soon no one doubts it, not even you. I am paraphrasing, but I think if we work on our personal best, kind of an inner competition with our best selves…it is not a bad thing at all. And the idea of shaking it up, shifting views, keeps us kind of fresh. I dunno but it works inside the studio. Maybe it works out there too. Good post Liz. JC
February 11th, 2008 at 7:16 pm
RayD said
Hi Jan,
“Working backwards” doesn’t sound like a great idea to me
Maybe we can coin a new phrase here: “Think backwards, work forward”! Or perhaps we should “Think anywhere”.

All great works started with ideas, but I’m pretty sure that not one of those ideas was “I / we can’t…”
February 11th, 2008 at 7:21 pm
RayD said
Oops! (here we go again)
I just realised that I said “working backward” myself in my first comment… Drat! I trust you get the meaning though…
February 11th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Jan!
Sometimes we put that spear so far out there that we always going and never quite getting anywhere. I’ve decided to arrive and then start going again. It’s been a nice new perspective on looking forward, working backward and forward again.
February 11th, 2008 at 7:29 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hey Ray!
I like the way you throw yourself in with abandon! Working backwards, as in doing the math, is a fine thing just as you first said it.

Keep coming back and keeping us all thinking.
February 11th, 2008 at 7:44 pm
Glenda Watson Hyatt said
Ray D, I love your strategy, whatever you may call it! I know where I want to be, I’m just not sure yet how to get there.
February 11th, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Janice C Cartier said
I like that Liz. Deciding to arrive. Good going guys. Great things to think about, but even better to act on. One of my best mentors( MacArthur Genius Award winner ) said train yourself to “think spherically”. Meaning in all dimensions. And do the work. I didn’t think of working backwards as a negative because the set point is the reach. I think it brings into focus what needs to be a part of the current day if indeed we intend to actually be there.
Liz brings up a huge point though, first being willing to take a look. Then where are we in relationship to that goal or that way of being. Lip service, or actualizing? Maybe that is the question. JC
February 11th, 2008 at 9:00 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
HI Jan,
I had an interesting conversation this weekend about how self-actualizing folks are always “becoming.” Sometimes we’re so focused on getting better that we never take stock of where we’ve gotten and we’re always pushing out the elusive prize.

It’s a relief, for me anyway, to stop to look back and forward and to see where I stand in relationship to each. Doing that keeps me grounded.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
Aruni said
Nicely said. I’m working on seeing the positive in the feedback I’m getting on the fundraising trail. So far I’ve met with a couple of investors and both had some great things to share. They were positive and haven’t closed the door so I’m going to take their suggestions and incorporate some and keep the rest in the back of my mind in case they come up again.

I can think back to when I have won but I’m going to focus on being a winner right now. Hopefully I can hold on to the feeling.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:20 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Aruni!
Aw, I’m sure you were a winner in school, in your neighborhood, in your family. It’s exciting to hear about what you’re doing. Keep that winner in you growing.
February 11th, 2008 at 9:23 pm
Janice C Cartier said
Liz,
Well we are all becoming. I think there is truly a danger of thinking it is always out there a bit further. So what if it is right now and that’s it? What are we being/doing right now? Does that snapshot match that wonderful film in our heads? I think that is the gap we are talking about. And if that’s the case, oops I have a lot of work to do in the am. But I am awfully excited about doing it. JC
February 11th, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Aruni said
Thanks Liz. I’m starting to realize that even if the outside world labels you a winner, you aren’t a winner until you think/believe you are. The internal self critic. I just got a book called Self Esteem. It looks like it will be an interesting read. I saw a blogger rave about it several weeks ago and I finally got it. Now I can’t remember who the blogger was!
February 11th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hey Jan!
I decided a few months ago I was going to BE my “future self” now! I figure I don’t have that much of a future left. I want to live it as the person I was seeing.
February 11th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Hey Aruni
It’s okay to know you’re good. Even the humblest star shines.
February 11th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Janice C Cartier said
Good idea, Liz. I could see that working as a company idea too. Be your future company now. Good post. Sweet dreams. Jan
February 11th, 2008 at 10:13 pm
ME Liz Strauss said
Exactly Jan,
Anything that works for people works for a people business.

Sleep well.
February 12th, 2008 at 7:13 am
Robert Hruzek said
Liz, I can’t believe I missed this one yesterday! This is an incredibly powerful tonic to the “why me” syndrome. Thank you for changing me! (Sound of eagle’s wings spreading wide…)
February 12th, 2008 at 9:01 am
ME Liz Strauss said
Hi Robert!
It is something that gets us to quit thinking that the world owes us someething or that some knight is coming to save the day! Yep.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:44 am
Maggie said
Awesome article!
February 23rd, 2008 at 12:46 am
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