17 Comments to “I Can’t”

1. July 14th, 2007 at 12:47 pm
   Joanna Young said

   Hi Liz

   I try to do battle with “can’t” too by seeing which verb I can change it for. Like “I’m not in a position to do this right now but I can see how I can get there in the future” (bit long I know!) or “I’m choosing not to”.

   The more you practice this kind of technique - like substituting “hard” for “less than totally easy” - the easier it becomes - and I think it does also start to shift the way we think… for the better.

   Thanks for reminding us of ways that we can expand our maps of the world :-)

   Joanna

2. July 14th, 2007 at 1:15 pm
   Jan said

   I know you can’t and you know what? That’s alright because I can’t either. Do everything that I would like to do I mean.

   Can’t doesn’t make you smaller. It may make your world smaller, but who are we to want everything?

   Can’t is a prerequisite for doing what you do and for doing it right. Without can’t would you tear yourself apart and end it up nothing but can’t.

   I dislike can’t as much as you do, but as long as we are acting under the human condition there is very little we can do about can’t except accepting it. Both yours and mine.

   Having just written he above I reread your post and obviously I am having issues with your writing as I always seem to get them wrong the first time around :-) Perhaps I am traveling with too much mental luggage and cannot think straight anymore…

   If you have 4 kinds of can’t you definitely have too many. How about this:

   can’t: I am facing a roadblock.

   Means I can’t right now or can’t this way. Take a time out or rethink the matter.

   can’t: I am powerless.

   This is the can’t I know. If you can’t you probably know someone who can though.

   can’t: I am without the skills.

   See above.

   can’t: I am unwilling.

   This is not a can’t, but a won’t in my book. If you won’t is there surely a good reason. If not try again…

3. July 14th, 2007 at 6:07 pm
   ME Strauss said

   Hi Joanna!
   Wow! I have to say your comment makes me think it’s you reminding me. :)

   Less than totally easy I so like that. It really is a reminder that I should think that my world has to come right up to me — on a tray, in my way, as I ordered. :)

   I’ll be thinking about his for at least a week. :)

4. July 14th, 2007 at 6:15 pm
   ME Strauss said

   Hi Jan,
   You weren’t having any trouble with my post, as far as I can see. And I find your response invigorating and illuminating about the human condition, as you say it is. You make many points. I especially like these:

   • Can’t is a prerequisite for doing what you do and for doing it right. Without can’t would you tear yourself apart and end it up nothing but can’t.
   • . . . as long as we are acting under the human condition there is very little we can do about can’t except accepting it.

   I like them both because of what you say to follow them. :)

   Thank you for the solutions to my “can’ts.” BTW I almost wrote “won’t” in the last one. :)

5. July 15th, 2007 at 8:20 am
   Mihaela Lica said

   Excuse me, my dear Liz, but how many times are you really using that word? For I’ve never heard you saying it.

   I do avoid “can’t” in life. I know I can. It’s just a matter of circumstances and will. Oh, yes… and time.

6. July 15th, 2007 at 9:21 am
   ME Strauss said

   Hi Mihaela!
   I rarely use it in public. It does have four letters after all. :) But sometimes I use it when I’m alone or talking with one friend about where I want to go. You’ll find out more about that in a few hours. . . . the word can’t will be in the title of a post. :)

7. July 15th, 2007 at 10:08 am
   Dar said

   Hi, Liz!

   Oh, you SO busted me using that word (and I thank you!) I didn’t realize it was part of my vocabulary. I connected with your definitions; they felt right for me.

   I’m putting this 4-letter word on notice as of right now. :-) If I say it, I’m committing to stop and discover what it is I’m ‘really’ saying.

   And maybe, just for fun, I’ll tally how many times I come in contact with it over the next week. (Shall I report back on here? Anyone else wanna play? LOL) :-)

   Good teachers keep their students thinking, Liz, and you have done that. I appreciate you!

8. July 15th, 2007 at 10:10 am
   ME Strauss said

   Hi Dar!
   What a great thought and challenge you pose! Putting that word on notice and keeping track of when it shows up. Yeah! Good on you. Sounds like you’re your own best teacher! You thought of that!!! :)

9. July 15th, 2007 at 10:27 am
   Jan said

   I just can’t take this anymore! :-)

   With great comments still pouring in am I tempted to post a fifth variation of can’t, which probably isn’t very helpful, but here goes nothing:

   can’t: I really shouldn’t.

   As in “I can’t do this to her”

   Just to save time I will deliver my advice right here as well: Then don’t!

   Actually there is one more I think. I am not sure how if it qualifies:

   can’t: loss of free will (sort of)

   This is sort of the reverse of the others as in “I can’t help myself. I just have to whatever…”

   My take: If it is something good then go ahead. If not get back to reality. Of course you can. If you have free will enough utter the words you have what it takes to alter your behavior.

   Since I can’t seem to stop I am now … (see how it works?!) :-)

10. July 15th, 2007 at 10:30 am
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Jan,
    I’m seeing how it works and wishing I would have named this post The Tyrrany of Can’t or The Can’t Addiction

11. July 15th, 2007 at 10:37 am
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12. July 15th, 2007 at 10:40 am
    Jan said

    Who says you can’t ;-)

    Sorry, I will stop already.

    Now please give us one more word from your upcoming post with “can’t” in the title so we have a chance of guessing what it could be about :-)

    I am willing to bet it is the solution to the problematic of Can’t, but I could be wrong. My suggestion would be to reflect about it as Dar suggested and then think about if you could have replaced can’t with a word more precisely describing the condition. Like shouldn’t or won’t for example. It would clarify things, which is good for everyone I think.

13. July 15th, 2007 at 11:35 am
    ME Strauss said

    Oh Jan,
    I’m so enjoying your sense of humor mixed into all of this.

    The new post title is tentatively “Can’ts, Cans, and Wendy Piersall.”

    And it involves many details including my brothers and “The Art of War.” :)

14. July 15th, 2007 at 11:55 am
    Jan said

    I hear Hollywood knocking. :-)

    Where is everybody? Even if I wasn’t six hours ahead of you I still wouldn’t be sleeping…

    Perhaps should I really set up a blog where I have an outlet for my rants. Only is it not half as much fun speaking to yourself…

15. July 15th, 2007 at 11:57 am
    Honman said

    “I can’t” can be excuses. I had an article on “Do you have excuses?” at http://www.openyourmindtoprosperity.com/prosperity/do-you-have-excuses/ .Take a look and gave your valuable comment.

16. July 15th, 2007 at 12:01 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hey Jan!
    You’re on your time off. I’m in my best work time and soon I leave for lunch on my son’s last day home . . . :)

    So I’m here, but I can’t . . . ;) :) :)

17. July 16th, 2007 at 7:46 pm
    He Can’t Let It Go . . . Maybe You Can’t Either - Liz Strauss at Successful Blog - Thinking, writing, business ideas . . . You’re only a stranger once. said

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