July 1, 2012

Why I love fear

molly published this at 3:00 am

Here there be monsters. Under the bed. In the closet. In the basement. Who else here knew how to jump from the doorway to the bed at night so that the monsters couldn’t grab your ankle and drag you under?

When you get older, we know that the only things under the bed are fossilized Skittles, the Renegade Sock That Escaped from the Dryer and dust bunnies.

What got rid of the monsters when you were a kid? For me, it was M&Ms, a flashlight and a mother who told me that I could vanquish my demons.

As an adult?

Good friends, the enlightenment within and of course, M&Ms (if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it).

“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” ~ Joseph Campbell

I love fear now. Fear is my friend. When fear is present, I know that I am close to a breakthrough in my evolutionary journey of becoming a fully functional Being.

The key to embracing fear is to understand what it represents. In order to do this, you’ll need friends, paper, pencil and chocolate.

First of all, learn to recognize your fear indicators.

Pay attention and when these twinges kick in, TRAIN YOURSELF TO ASK, “What am I afraid of?” Write it down or otherwise record it.

Get to a place where you can process your answers, and your next step is to ask yourself, “Why am I afraid of this?” This step may take some time. Bring enough chocolate. (By the way, the “why” is your flashlight).

Now “enter the cave.” When you prioritize and address your fears, they vanish like mirages in the desert. They vanish like mirages in the desert. Paradox is a hoot and a half.

To truly purge the power of your fear, have a good, long, healthy laugh at yourself for boxing at shadows. It is one of the most liberating feelings you’ll ever experience. I promise.

What fears have you overcome? How did you “embrace the beast”? What still remains for you to conquer? What has been your experience?

——-

Molly Cantrell-Kraig is a woman with drive. Possessing an innate sense of purpose and a pragmatic, solution-based approach to empowering people, she fused these two traits in order to establish Women With Drive Foundation. Based upon its founder’s personal history, Women With Drive Foundation is a means through which Cantrell-Kraig may effect change on both a micro and macro level. By providing women with something as essential as personal transportation in order to transition them from poverty to prosperity, she, through Women With Drive Foundation, seeks to empower women to help them help themselves. Follow Molly on twitter as @mckra1g or @WWDr1ve (Women With Drive Foundation).

Filed under management, Motivation, Successful Blog | 12 Comments »


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12 Comments to “Why I love fear”

  1. July 1st, 2012 at 3:16 am
    Ali Davies said

    A question I find helps when fear raises it’s head is “What needs to happen so that I feel safe to walk forward despite the fear?”

    By focusing on actioning those things, I am then distracted from teh fear itself and feel that I am managing the fear rather than it manage me.

  2. July 1st, 2012 at 3:37 am
    Catherine White said

    I find fear intoxicating. I’m afraid when I’m not afraid, as it means I’m not pushing my limits.

  3. July 1st, 2012 at 2:09 pm
    molly said

    That’s a great addition, Ali. Some of the things that need to be present are within our control and some of them aren’t, but raising the question sets the conditions in motion for overcoming fear as an obstacle.

    Good point. Thanks for your thoughts today! :)

  4. July 1st, 2012 at 2:11 pm
    Michele Price (@prosperitygal) said

    Interesting, I have never found fear intoxicating – great way to lean into uncertainty.

    I have just allowed myself to keep moving through it,so whether it is crying, throwing up or making me want to scream I ask myself “What is on the other side of this hurdle I want to experience?”

  5. July 1st, 2012 at 2:11 pm
    molly said

    Catherine, your comment reminds me of author and SOBCon speaker Steve Farber’s OS!M ~ the point at which you realize you’re beyond the point of return after making a decision.

    http://www.stevefarber.com/2010/10/feeling-safe-thats-scary/

    His point is that fear is a state to embrace and welcome if we wish to challenge ourselves to reach greater capacity and heights. Great point and thanks for bringing it into the discussion!

    Best, M. :)

  6. July 1st, 2012 at 2:59 pm
    molly said

    Interesting distinction, Michele. Intoxicating is a word fraught with different meanings to different people. Your method of asking for the hurdle is significant and reminds me of poet Robert Frost’s quote, “The best way out is always through.”

    Thanks for adding your perspective today! :D

  7. July 2nd, 2012 at 6:55 am
    Rocky said

    I face my fear and live life to the fullest!:-)

  8. July 2nd, 2012 at 8:37 am
    molly said

    Rock ‘n roll, Rocky! :) Have a great week!

  9. July 9th, 2012 at 3:54 pm
    Ara Bedrossian said

    Watch the watcher. Witness the thinker making more out of something than it is. I’ve started doing this later in my life. I decided to face the fear of failure that was making me the cynical judge that I was. Enbracing the beast is all about realizing that we’re all the same, and no matter what your suffering is over, we’re all yearning for something to make this life more worth it. Be passionate in life, but unemotional in judgment. Cheers!

  10. July 10th, 2012 at 7:03 am
    Liz said

    Hi Ara,
    A beautiful way of thinking. Thank you. As I read your comment this morning, I was inspired. :)

  11. July 10th, 2012 at 7:08 am
    mckra1g said

    >Be passionate in life, but unemotional in judgment.

    Wow. This is great stuff, Ara.

    When we assign value to input through the filter of emotion, we skew it. Therefore, dispassionate “collection” is key.

    However, output (or our responses to stimuli) carry farther and have greater impact when accompanied by passion.

    Thanks so much for weighing in. Your insights add to the conversation. Best, M. :)

  12. August 8th, 2012 at 1:29 pm
    Decisions Make Me Dizzy – Reconnecting Mind and Body | Roots to Blossom said

    [...] Why I love fear (successful-blog.com) Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like this. This entry was posted on August 8, 2012, in abuse, perfectionism, stress and tagged choices, courage, decisions, fear, goals, hope, inner critic, Interview. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment [...]

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