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Change the World: Positively Surprise a Grownup

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A Good Surprise Is So Long in Coming Sometimes

Change the World!

Most children love surprises. Most adults wish they did. The reason adults don’t like surprises is that too many are negative surprises that we weren’t prepared for — had we been prepared, they wouldn’t qualify as surprises. . . .

The sad thing is one or two negative surprises can teach a person to live defensively, always preparing for the possible negative outcomes, imagining every worst case scenario, never to be caught off guard again.

We worry about negatives because positive things don’t hurt us.

Ellen Weber, Ph.D, told us new research shows that worrying shrinks our gray matter. So we’re really hurting ourselves and our ability to contribute when we worry defensively that way.

What if we could show folks that good surprises do still happen?

I remember research that showed it takes 5 positive statements to overcome 1 negative statement that we take to heart. But then, how hard is it to say a nice thing?

What if we passed along every kind word that we heard about someone? What if we added a few ourselves? What if we went first to find a way to show folks that we’re glad they’re on the planet, that we value their contribution, that some small thing about them is worth a positive remark or comment?

The smiles alone would be worth every word and bit of energy that we invested. Some of those smiles would even make a difference in our own lives and our businesses. Can’t beat an ROI like that.

There just aren’t enough good grownup surprises. Positively surprise a grownup, it’s surprising how wonderful it feels.

We can change the world — just like that.
–ME “Liz” Strauss
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If you’re ready to change the world, send me your thoughts in a guest post. Feel free to take the gorgeous Change the World image up there that Sandy designed back to your blog. Or help yourself to this one.

Change the World!.

Email me about what you’re doing or what we might do. Let’s change the world one bit at a time together. Together it can’t take forever.

No Worries for You, Me, and Martha . . .

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I've been thinking . . .

When I worked in publishing, a beautiful young woman named, Martha, worked as the communications coordinator for my department. She is an amazing person, other-centered, gracious, gentle, and soft-spoken.

Martha and I would meet every morning and she was always able to tell me the exact location in the process of any lesson or piece of art across some 10,000 pages. She understood my quirks and habits. I often think on her as St. Martha.

She is such grace. I hear her say “Oh Liz,” and flash a radiant smile — the sort that people remark upon — as she reads that last paragraph. When Martha would get the slightest look of stress, I’d rush to say, “No worries,” and explain the possible worst-case outcome.

One day Martha said that she realized I picked up that phrase, “No worries” when I traveled in Australia. We talked a while about the work I used to do there. She told me she hoped I always used that phrase, “No worries.”

A few years ago, Martha moved to Houston. Gosh, I miss her. . . . This week Martha gave birth to her first born, a son.

So I write this for you, and for me and for Martha.

What ever we’re worrying about right now . . . worrying won’t fix it.

Worrying about it only takes away our brain power. With our worrying, we’re more likely to make our problems worse, not better. Our worries throw off our brain chemistry. They divert our best problem-solving energy. They channel our thoughts to a place where our negative imagining gets in the way of actual progress. We’ve left behind any chance of positive reasoning.

Change one little sound in that word, worrying and we find it’s wearing.. Oh how wearing worrying can be.

When I’m stuck in a loop, in which I can’t seem to stop worrying, I take a walk, fly a kite, clean out my closet –- do something physical that I know I can easily accomplish. I put my thoughts into the world. I get my blood moving into my brain. I let my subconscious work on the problem without my interfering help. It doesn’t need the road blocks my worrying keeps putting in the way.

That break from fretting and over-analyzing my situation brings me new energy and information. I come back refreshed and ready to face the problem minus that stress that I most surely was causing.

New resources show themselves more quickly. New solutions appear on the horizon. I figure out much more easily whether I need to find some help.

Losing my worries for a while always has a positive impact.

No Worries, have a weekend instead.

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