Forgive the Guy You Don’t Like
One of the best things about growing up shy is that I became an observer. I watch people and the patterns in our behavior. Yeah, I watch myself too.
Sometimes we do this curious thing. It’s as if we have two dictionaries. One dictionary we use when we talk about people we love and people we think are good. The other we use when we talk about people who scare us, have hurt us, or for some reason we have decided are not good enough.
The first dictionary has the words forgiveness and compassion. The second does not. When we decide we don’t like someone enough, we pick up that second dictionary. We find words like righteous and noble and use them to talk about ourselves and our feelings. Our noble selves decide how other folks think, forgetting entirely that they are people who love their children too.
I think that’s why my mother said, “If you can’t say something nice . . . ”
It seems a small thing, but it’s not. Think of the difference it would make in a life if we lived by that rule.
We can change the world — just like that.
–ME “Liz” Strauss
Hi!
Happy Fourth of July!
It’s nice to step back and “Pay it Forward” once in a while, isn’t it? Thanks for the reminder, Liz.
Happy 4th to you, Liz, and thanks for all the great thoughts here. You’re really doing a heck of a job of putting up great, thoughtful posts. Best to you today.
Synchronicity in action! I came across this in the latest book I’m reading:
Look at the word “forgiveness”. In the center are four letters “give.” There’s the clue. You must give to be free. The biggest gift you have to offer is love. Remember, you can’t give what you don’t already have. If you don’t have love within you, how can you give it? It starts with forgiving yourself.
Hi David!
Thanks for stopping by on the holiday! 🙂
Yeah if we could keep our minds on the future.
Hi Chris,
I’ll take all of the encouragement I can get. I’m soooooo under the weather. I need my head optimized. Of course, that’s so when I’m feeling fine, isn’t it? 🙂
Have fun with the world today!
Ms. !
What you say in that comment is so wise. I can’t give what I don’t have. Might I add, I can’t receive what I can’t see?
We are a fascinating species . . . how we can go blind to what we don’t want to see. 🙂
Hi Liz!
Brilliant, just brilliant. Fabulous Liz…truly!
greetings on this most fortuitous Fourth. This so called out to me since i notice i judge when i feel hurt or ignored. So along with enjoying your birthday parfait, how’s about another read at this
http://fishcreekhouse.blogspot.com/2007/07/in-spirit.html
GP in montana who’s last few days have definitely been on forgiveness, compassion.
Thank you for another great entry
Hi GP!
I read your entry. How beautiful. I think I understand.
It’s wisdom to notice that we judge when we’re afraid — hurt or ignored — when we feel like we’re not enough. Maybe if we had more forgiveness and compassion for ourselves . . .
Liz in Chicago who values her friend in Montana
Happy Fourth of July! Hope to see your updated soon.