Get Closer to You
This is a series of questions, I don’t know how many. They are the ones I ask when I help folks get closer to their personal identity.
What words of wisdom given to you have you passed on over and over? Why do you think that is?
I’ll answer first to get things started.
–ME “Liz” Strauss
Check out the Work with Liz!! page in the sidebar.
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There have been so many, but the words that come to mind this morning are
At the time, a friend passed these words on to me, I needed to hear them. It was too easy then to let the world and the universe revolve around my view and my needs . . . Of course, until we learn, we never know we’re doing that until someone points it out, do we?
I’ve passed these words on often because of how often they’ve saved me. When my adrenalin is running and I think the answers are all in my head, I know to call them up to get a better view.
Now, lately, as I come to find how to help folks get their head, heart, and purpose all going in the same direction, the ability to be onself for purpose and see other people for response is a life skill that seems to make all the pieces of business and life fit together with abundance and in harmony.
My mum always comes out with some gems. When I was about to start university, and I was moving into the Halls of Residence, I was so nervous. Not knowing a soul, I was ready to forget the whole university thing and turn around and head for home. I was surrounded by strangers with not one familiar face among them. My mum sat me down on the edge of my new, unwelcoming bed and said, “But they’re not strangers; they’re just friends you haven’t met yet.” She was right, of course, and I made many friends over the coming days. I’ve carried these words with me ever since, and recall them especially when I find myself in a situation where I don’t know anyone.
Another one from Mum, is an old Scot’s saying which is “Aye, what’s for you won’t go passed you.” Meaning that if it’s meant to be then it will be. This has helped me come to terms with those moments in life when things just don’t work out: you miss out on an opportunity, you lose out on a house sale, you didn’t make it to an event etc. It helps me to reassert my positive outlook and focus on what good things will be coming my way in the future, as a result from the supposed setback. A couple of years ago I heard the zen saying “No snowflake falss in the wrong place” which I think menas the exact same thing. Isn’t it amazing how variations of the same wisdom crop up worlds apart?
trust your instincts – and it was a business mentor who told me that in parallel to being a mom – she said you KNOW what to do, trust your instincts and do it
A good friend of mine once comforted me by saying, “It came to pass.”
I can take that simple sentence two different ways. It can either mean “It will eventually be done and gone,” which is a reassurance when it’s something particularly unpleasant or tedious. And it can also mean, “It came in order to leave,” which is a reassurance that some things come and go as part of the natural rhythms of one’s own life. Be they be good, bad, neutral, or anything else, some things only came into your life so that they could leave – and it’s up to you to learn from the experience while and after they’re here.
My mom also gave me a very sturdy adage: “Adapt, Improvise, Overcome.” I don’t think I need to elaborate on that one! =)
Thanks, Liz – good question.
Hi Amy!
What a pair of ideas you brought this morning! All of the people who we meet bring us events that were meant to be part of our lives. . . .
Yeah, your mom is a wise woman. When she got you to look at them as friends, she got you to quit looking at yourself as alone. It’s a common theme that when we look at other people instead of ourselves the world gets friendlier and easier to to manage.
Your friend, Scot, is also someone I’d like to meet.
Hi Liz
“Work smarter, not harder.”
“If you don’t know where you’re going – any road will do.”
“Wisdom comes from experience, and experience comes from making mistakes!”
My mentor keeps me constantly on my toes with these gems. And always happy to ‘oblige’ him by following (trying to) them. They brought me good results so far!
Karin H. (Keep It Simple Sweetheart, specially in business)
Hi Mother Earth!
We’re all born authentic and knowing who we are . . . we spend the rest of our trying to get back there. It’s our own truth that we lose touch with.
As I work with folks to focus their life/business vision, nothing strikes me more than how important it is that we realize that the answers are within us, but the solutions are outside us.
Sorry Liz, I realise now that I didn’t make myself very clear. Scot isn’t a person – Scot’s is a way of referring to something belonging to the Scottish people. I think that’s my colloquial turn of phrase confusing everyone again!
Hi Kusani,
Once told me only 4 words are always true, “This too shall pass.”
I’ve done some of the same thinking that you explain in your comment. It’s a wonder and a comfort to get in touch with the cycle of life, letting ourselves be a part of the whole.
Hi Karin!
Your (our) mentor is always adding wisdom to the conversation here. But I do notice that you’re the one who know which bit applies where. π
LOL Liz
Must be down to my ‘top strengths’ – maximiser and connectedness π
Karin H.
My dad always used to tell us, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results every time”. (I’m sure he didn’t come up with it — he has a passion for collecting random quotes from everywhere.)
The funny thing is, he used to tell us that *over and over*, as if he expected that my brother and I would stop doing whatever insane thing we were doing.
Anyway, now I find myself telling other people — students, my step-kids, random passers-by — the same thing. Over and over.
So what does that tell you?
Ah Amy!
I know that. I had a bit of Scots hospitality in my day. Hope to have more soon.
I just know too many men named Scot I think .
Bill early, bill often.
Anthony,
It’s advice I learned the hard way. It’s much more difficult to bill after the working relationship is over. π
Liz, I am smiling at you teasing Amy π
Mine isn’t one that’s been passed on but one I’ve learned to say to myself, and to others who need it:
“What’s the easiest way of doing this?”
So often we get caught up in the drama of problems, using excuses to fuel our procrastination, thinking through all the what ifs and might bes, making heroes of ourselves for surviving the challenge of the journey… rather than just finding the door and walking on through π
Joanna
What can I say – I’m easy teased π
Hi Joanna!
Your question when coupled with the idea of procrastination is so amazingly powerful!
I’m keeping it close to make sure I use it.
Amy,
If teasing means that you are loved massively. I sure was teasing you. π
The words that comes to mind now are: “follow your heart”, go with your instincts, to it and never ask “what if”.
I am trying to follow it more and more these days.
Liz, your blog is great, I try to read it everyday.
Hi Tanny!
Welcome and thank you!
I try to follow every “What if?” with a “So what?” whenever I can. π
While it may not resonate with all, I remind myself every day of Jeremiah 29:11 Γ’β¬ΕΓ’β¬β’for I know the plans I have for you,Γ’β¬β’ declares the Lord, Γ’β¬Λplans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.Γ’β¬β’Γ’β¬Β
Calms me every time- great stress reliever for me π
A sentence I keep sharing comes from the novelist G. K. Chesterton, who once wrote, “If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing badly.” I find that immensely encouraging.
Along the same lines, Nick Lowe was asked about his approach to songwriting in an interview back in the early eighties, and he said that his motto was “Bash it out now, and tart it up later.”
Too often we’re told that we need to be good at something before we even start, we get caught up in perfectionism, and we’re too timid to take chances.
Other favorite maxims?
“Any problem can be solved with the materials on hand in the room at the time.” – Edwin Land, inventor of the Polaroid camera
and – especially for the bloggers among us:
“A small daily task, if it be really daily, will beat the labours of a spasmodic Hercules.” – Anthony Trollope
Thanks for starting this thread, Liz!
Hi Lani!
Wonderful! Thank you for bringing that! It’s the whole idea . . . we’re supposed to be happy.
It’s the only thing that makes sense.
Hi Elizabeth!
How delightful to see you!
I so enjoyed reading the gems you brought — all of them. I see your eyes smiling when I read them.
Everyone of them is a word from Elizabeth Perry shouting out “Understand and live your power. You are capable of great things.”
“Always leave the other guy a place to stand.” That’s darn smart and perfect, Liz. Not just a good negotiation and conflict resolution strategy…but pretty life-relevant in general, too.
#12
Aw Dustin!
Sorry to keep you waiting. This serve stuff is making me crazy. π
It’s so human to be describing something that should be done while we’re actually doing it.
I so love your example!
If at first you don’t succeed . . . π
Hi Tammy!
Yeah, I wish I learned it a whole lot sooner, and remembered it more often. π
From my dad —
“You can learn something from everyone you meet.”
I never forgot it.
Hey Sunny!
Keeping that outlook keeps our beginner’s mind alive.
My dad told me once-upon-a-time, “Don’t ever start a fight, but if you have to fight, finish it.”
(Context: 13 yrs old, little bit of trouble at school, two boys sorting out their place in the pecking order)
Years later I recognized that pithy saying in the writings of Sun Tzu and others. Picking your battles, sticking to your principles, winning decisively. All principles that I have used in life and business and work, to great effect.
Throughout my career, when I have had the opportunity to mentor or coach someone, these words frequently came to mind, as interpersonal conflict causes so much stress in today’s world.
“Your only competition is yourself.” Whether it was me as a sixth grader praying my chest wouldn’t be sooo flat, or as a 30-year-old not being where I thought I would be, this advice from my mother has kept me focused.
My energy is best spent using my talents, experiences and time to be MY absolute best, not Jane’s best. We are all unique and that is a great thing.
I tell this to everyone, but especially teenagers and young professionals.
Hi Stephen!
Welcome!
That’s a sentence that’s been coming back to me over my life as well. So few things in life are worth fighting for. I often think “Do I want to think of myself as someone who invests THIS much in THIS thing?” That does a world of good for my perspective. π
Hi Towanda!
When I figured out that trying to be something “more” than I am only turned me into a bad facsimile of “me,” I was a great deal better off. π
Liz, I thought of another one this morning, when I caught myself saying it (to myself!)
It was:
“Screw your courage to the sticking place”
I realised I often say this to myself when I’m about to do something I feel a little nervous about.
Joanna
PS Keeping up with yesterday’s Scottish theme it’s from the Scottish play… but I know you knew that π
Hi Joanna!
That bit of wisdom comes in handly, I bet, in many circumstance. I’ve heart it before but until now it wasn’t written in my head/heart.
No, I had no idea where it originated. Who’s teasing who now? [grin, smil]