Liz Strauss at Successful Blog

Thinking, writing, business ideas … You’re only a stranger once.

November 11, 2008

Are You Listening? Influence and Participation Above the Noise

ME Liz Strauss wrote this at 9:34 am

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Listening Is Essential to Communication

“To listen well, is as powerful a means of influence as to talk well, and is as essential to all true conversation” –Chinese Proverb

Last week, I got a chance to talk with Patrick Rooney, of the Zócalo Group in Chicago. As we discussed social media, Patrick discussed the perspective of corporate clients moving into the social media space now. He made a powerful point about how some corporate clients are slow to enter social media because they perceive bloggers as having no forgiveness for mistakes they might make. [not a direct quote]

Patrick and I talked about the digital divide that needs closing. the stereotypes in both directions: a bunch of undisciplined bloggers and social media rockstars who don’t like companies and a bunch of uptight, uppity corporate folks who think they know more than everything. We discussed opportunities to get some conversations started. I told him about the barns and bridges project. We made some plans to move things forward.

It seems so easy. All we had to was introduce them and get them talking and listening. Listening is the crucial part.

Influence and Participation Above the Noise

If you want to make a deal or a partnership, build a bridge, or solve a conflict, listening is the way in. If we don’t listen to what people believe, what they need, or what their goals are, how could we have their best interests in mind?

Listening is influence. A good listener has the power to change conduct, thought, or decisions, by encouraging discussions to go deeper, thoughts to get bigger, and people to raise their ideas above the noise.

Listening is participation. Great listeners are involved and thinking. That’s how we connect with other people’s ideas and values. Active listening helps us find the places where our minds meet and understand the places where our ideas separate. Here are just a few ways that listening enhances influence through participation.
Listening:

We talk, teach, tell people what we think and walk away feeling we’ve had an influence. Have we really? The folks we’re addressing could be ignoring every word we say and smiling while they do so.

If we want to form effective partnerships — raise barns and build bridges — we have to understand what the other guy cares about, where he or she is going and which of our goals match well alongside those. Listening tunes us in to potential partners.

Listen gives us direction and purpose in any collaboration. When we listen first, we make better choices about what we say and how we say it. Our voices become more powerful.

. . . it’s the listening that separates Social Media experts from Social Media theorists. said Brian Solis

Has social media changed the way you listen? How would you explain listening online to someone who’s new here?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

Some Listening Resources:
Chris Brogan offers a slew of advice on how to listen.
Conversations are happening online in all kinds of places. It’s important to understand how to get in there, and how to listen where the conversations are happening. Here’s a very impartial list of places to listen and how.

Once you’re through Chris’ list, here’s a Starter List of a few more Web 2.0 Social Tools.

Some new new tools that help us tune in include:
monitter, which allows you to follow conversations by keywordyacktrack which allows you to track a single term or a url, social mention which searches across 8 web media formats

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12 Comments to “Are You Listening? Influence and Participation Above the Noise”

  1. November 11th, 2008 at 11:23 am
    Todd Smith said

    Great point, Liz. Broadcasting is not the same as listening, is it?

  2. November 11th, 2008 at 11:26 am
    Jannie said

    I find when I’m talking more than my interlocuteur is, it’s time for me to be quiet and let them take the floor, this seems to keep them coming back for more.

  3. November 11th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Todd,
    Broadcasting isn’t even talking… :)

  4. November 11th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Jannie!
    One I forgot to include in the list … listening gives us lots to blog about. I’m listening different offline because of what I’ve learned online. :)

  5. November 11th, 2008 at 4:03 pm
    Kathy @ Virtual Impax said

    Liz - YOU ARE AMAZING!!! (As always!)

    I really have to “work” at commenting because - in cases like this blog post - it’s so easy to just “listen”.

    However, this comment has a purpose and that is to THANK YOU for the resources you “slipped” in at the end. Monittor is AMAZING!

  6. November 11th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
    Richard Reeve said

    One of my goals, which to this point I’ve managed to keep, is: respond to all messages, even if just a “thanks”, or a “is that so.” Now I realize is scale increases, 100% compliance may not be possible, but the posture toward others can remain even if it becomes too much to participate with all the threads…
    (one exception, I tend not to respond to auto-messages from new follower…maybe I should take a look at that?)

  7. November 11th, 2008 at 7:22 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Kathy!
    Thanks, it’s hard to bring together so much information and instigate a conversation too. I’m working on that. :)

    Glad you found that short list of resources helpful!

  8. November 11th, 2008 at 7:24 pm
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Richard,
    I find absolutely nothing wrong with not having time to talk to an automatic message. I don’t talk to voice mail messages either.

    I like how you put your thoughts “keep the posture.” Yes. :)

  9. November 12th, 2008 at 1:32 am
    Hump Day Reading for the Restless Soul — Write From Home said

    [...] Are You Listening? Influence and Participation Above the Noise at Successful Blog [...]

  10. November 13th, 2008 at 6:17 am
    Read What Helps You said

    [...] Strauss wrote a post Are You Listening? Influence and Participation Above the Noise that brings up the importance of correct social marketing. And guess where it starts? Listening! [...]

  11. November 13th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
    Richard McInnis said

    Hi Liz,
    What a great post, you hit it dead on. I work with both agencies and corporations daily that are now entering the world of social media and realizing the importance of listening and the valuable resource it can be for all aspects of their business. Posts like this help convey that message increase the awareness of listening.
    Hope to see you in SXSW again this year.
    Cheers,
    Richard
    Radian6

  12. November 14th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
    Online Marketing - Blog Marketing - Social Media - Web 2.0 said

    Online Marketing Friday Links Round Up…

    Yee-haw! This week had some really good reading in the blogosphere. Many thought provoking and even more providing awesome resources that I didn’t even know about.
    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: “”, url: “” });……

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