Mr. um, I mean Ms. er, Sir, Ma’am?
For those who come looking for a short, thoughtful read, a blogging life discussion, or a way to gradually ease back into the week. I offer this bloggy life question. . .
You’ve been approached by a well-financed enterprised to blog for them on a high-end blog, called Views. The blogging team will be you and one other person, someone of the opposite sex. Each of you will be paid US$60,000/year to post at least six times a week about your opinions on any topic– from music to arithmetic.The blog will be launched with a massive media blitz, and you’ll have access to the resources of an entire media library for photos and content.
The catch? Each of you must blog under the guise of a member of the opposite sex — in other words, you’d be switching roles — and your contract binds you to keep your true identity secret.
How do you respond?
–ME “Liz” Strauss
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I’d say were do I sign and let the games begin. 😉
It does sound a bit like fun, doesn’t it, Norelle?
Yeah it does, Bruce.
How did I know you were going to say that?
So what is your view on the footies this year, Norelle? 🙂
You knew because it’s The Bruce & Norelle Show.
Now Bruce … I’m not really that interested in the footie, unless by footie you’re talking about pedicures … Now, the secret to a good …
Oh here we go, this is harder to do than folk might think it is. . . .
What not shoes???
It’s not that hard Liz Bruce – just go with the most basic sterotypes and be creative, have some fun – sheesh, do I gotta tell you men everything.
Yes, dear.
BTW, that “Liz” should have had a line through it – just so we don’t scare readers away.
Hey, that’s right. I think you just blew my 60K contract in like 10 minutes flat. Darn.
Damn right it’s “Yes, dear”.
Yep, that didn’t last long – do we get to keep some of the 60K? I want to go shopping … saw these new pair of shoes and …
Well, I suppose, you floosie, you get to keep on going with the gig. No one knows who you are.
Bruce … that’s very sexist of you to say that. I thought we were past those days (insert a few nag lines here, and here and … here).
You wouldn’t want us to start burning our bras again? (Ah man, now I’m confused – can I be Bruce for a sec and say “Burn the Bra! Burn the Bra!)
You’re not fooling me. I know what you’re doing. You’re aiming for the whole $120K. I got you’re number, Charlie.
Charlie’s my middle name. And yep, you got me. I can switch it on and off just like that. Who needs men!
Norelle,
You’re way too clever!
Sorry Bruce, you’re out of the picture. I’ve taken over both contracts and merged them together … I am Woman, Hear me Roar!
Could I have both of your autographs.
Sorry, I’ve lost the art of handwriting ever since this computer thingy came about.
BTW, does that mean I have to pay double to get into Chartreuse’s new hangout?
Did you get in? I think that means you have to take the quiz twice and get two passwords for sure.
That’s a tough one. Since it would be a more personal blog, I think that would make the entries more challenging, because voice would be so important, and men & women often have different voices. Plus, if you can’t reveal your identity then you can’t use it as a reference if something better (i.e. where the blogger has more freedom) comes along. Yes, tempting as it is, I think I would probably have to turn the offer down.
Nah, I must be one of the 90% and I’m too lazy to study for the quiz.
Goodnight Norelle/Charlie/Bruce – take a bow.
We’re scaring away any potential readers/commenters and I’m starting to feel like a character out of Hemingway’s “Garden of Eden”.
I don’t want to interrupt you two girly-guys, but my answer would be:
Yes.
And I’d take all the insults now that my blog posts tells you how to deal with ’em.
And I’d do product placement, which I’ll deal with tomorrow nite around 6 PM CST, USA.
Yes, those are hints.
Hi Caryn,
Just with the playing we were doing right there I was finding very hard to figure ou exactly what to say. Maybe if I hung around with guys more, it would be different for me. Or maybe if no one knew, I wouldn’t feel self-conscious.
But I think you’re on to something about the voices being different. I’d love to think I could try it — but there would also be that conflict of screwing with the readers. I don’t like that either.
Good night Martin and the gang!
It was nice trying out the new blog with you. Enjoy the cash American!
Spot on – if no one knew you’d be less self-conscious, but I’d ask for more money as you really have to be on the ball.
And you found it hard! Is it a good or bad thing that I actually found it easy?
Maybe it’s easier for a guy to fake being a woman than the other way around. 🙂
Maybe it’s also because we’re always thinking about women.
Well, that’s my excuse and I’m sticking with it. 🙂
And here I thought it was because, we just couldn’t get that base . . . er basic. Yeah, that’s what I meant, basic. 🙂
I know what what you meant… give us more credit than that or … Nahrr:
That’s just our basic instincts – “I am Man, Hear me Roar”.
It’s Monday. It’s midday. It’s sunny out. I’m outta here.
I don’t know, but for some unknown reason I have this desire to hire out the film “Basic Instinct”.
arrivederci fellow thespians
You get plenty of credit, I think. 🙂
Roar away oh great lions!
Go think up your Blog Column, you’re going to have to write it sooner than you know . . . Good night, Martin!
Count me in. You know who I am?
Yes, DOLL, I know who you are. You’re in. Could you share some of the money? 🙂
My immediate reaction was to go for it, the money was good, exploring my feminine side is good. However I don’t think I could watch and blog on chick flicks and TV shows (Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants, the Glimore Girls).
At a first glance, I say no. But after doing the math, it’s 192.30 per post. That’s another ball game here. All I need is hang around with guys more. Get personal. Get into their
pantsheads, if the subject matter calls for it. It’s a win-win situation……Oh bummer, I can’t I forget I’m already into one pants. Maybe, next life. 😉Hi Vincent,
When I wrote the situation, I wrote attempting to put in convflict for myself about how I would answer. My first response was like yours, I would go for it and consider it an adventure.
Then I started to realize what it would cost in personal investment and how it would rub against my natural need to be forthright with people. That’s when I wasn’t so sure that I could do it.
By the way, if watching chick flicks and TV shows (Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants, the Glimore Girls), is the criteria for any job, I’m not the candidate either. 🙂
Hey, Renée, I am so laughing at your comment. I made the money just high enough that it would be enticing, after six posts a week is hardly a full=time job, unless you’re commenting back every minute.
Then I started thinking about what you wrote and now I’m laughing about this . . . Let’s say you took the position (*giggle*) to blog as a guy for the new VIew Blog. Then you started hanging with guys to *get personal, * let’s say you were single and you did get in their pants. Would that make you a straight woman in the 3-D world, but a gay man on the blog?
I’d like to think I could do it, but I don’t think I could. Writing as myself is difficult enough, channelling my brother everyday would be too much for me, I think.
And (going back to our virtual community honesty conversation) what about comments. All the chit-chat would have to be in the false-voice also?
And (if the switch is a secret) what, exactly is the point? Why would the writers be asked to do this? The bloggers are keeping the whole deal a secret. But will it be revealed later?
Hi Katied,
Well, yes all of the chitchat in the comments would have to be in character too. I guess the reason for the secret is some sort of an experiment. Maybe the backers want to come out with a big splash at the point at which the blog starts its final decline in order to revive it.
Who knows? I just make these things up. 🙂
(Good Morning Liz!)
Ah, you just make these things up? I knew it sounded too interesting. I guess now there’s no point in wondering if my favorite blogger has switched genders on me?
Good morning, Katie!
It’s hard too — making up good ones, finding a conflict that doesn’t sound hokey that will get folks of all kinds interested.
I’m not planning to blog as a guy, nor am I planning to become one. End of story. 🙂
And that raises another question. Would they post photos — only switch the labels?
It’s so complicated…
That’s a good question, because then you’re getting into the realm of outright lying.
As the producer of the show, I’d change the title to “Inside Their Heads” and say it wasn’t in keeping to show how they look, because the blog is about how they think. 😉
LOL, Liz and Martin (aka Bruce and Norelle)!
That is a tough question — take the money and run, or as Caryn says, think about the long term.
Well, I used to know a ghost writer who made big bucks. So I guess his long-term was fine, even though he couldn’t admit in public which books he wrote.
If it’s ok for books (although it always bugs me when I find out that a book was ghost-written) should it be ok for blogs?
Not to mention the whole question of could I write as a guy?
Hey Sabine,
I love to hear we made you laugh!
Yeah, those last two questions are the ones that stop me too. I need the money, but could I do it. I think my gut woulc say “no.”
It sounds like a huge lot of fun, but I wouldn’t be able to keep my trap shut. *laugh* Everyone I know (and some I don’t)know I’m a secret shopper. I’d be kicked from the contract in days.
But I’d definitely give it a try. Sounds like a fun adventure.
Hey Whims,
The problem that seems to keep coming out is that most of us bloggers don’t believe we can put our personalities in the backseat long enough to make it work. 🙂
Oh gawd yes, I think that’d be a hoot! Wait, a guy would probably say, “Hell yeah!” (then scratch the groin)
*giggle*
Dang, guys don’t giggle….I’m gonna have to work on this…
I think we all need to go out drinking to practice. 🙂
No. Keep the money. Sounds like fun, eh?
There’s also trust. No way I could trust anyone pulling a trick like that. Even if “just for fun”.
We can’t see each other online, All we have to go by is the written word. If you’re faking one part of yourself (gender, in this case), you may just as well be faking the rest. There’s no way anyone could tell otherwise.
Integrity is too important to comprise. Online or off.
Hi Scorpia,
Much as I need the cash, I end up where you are over and over.
Scorpia, yes. The trust. If there’s a blogger’s code, this assignment goes against everything it stands for.
Hi Katie,
That Blogger’s Code of Ethics is very cool. Thanks for leaving the link here. 🙂
It was a lucky find. I’d already typed the phrase and then thought — you can’t just make something up as if it really exists.
Well I could — but then I’d have to define it. Which seemed a little out of the scope of a comment.
Since there’s nothing worse than backing out of a comment, I was very glad to find someone who had a Blogger’s Code all typed out for me.
And I thought it was a good start. It’s a little heavy on the journalism perspective. But that’s addressed in the comments.
And it’s just one guy’s idea….
well, Katie, I think thats probably how some of the most famous news stories have gotten their start. At least that’s what I bet. 🙂
Gosh, and I misspelled “compromise” back there. How embarrassing.
Anyway, I just looked over that “code of ethics”. The guy does come on pretty strong and I see he raised a few backs with it.
The most important things to me are honesty and fairness. Bias is impossible to avoid, but it can be balanced.
There is so much misinformation and disinformation on the net, sometimes getting to the truth is difficult. Outright falsity only makes things worse.
I’ve been tricked in that way, and I agree. It’s an ugly and mean thing to do. It’s easy to play around with the idea, but it’s not a game when real people enter the picture.
Liz, What you say about some of the most famous stories reminds me of all the times people get tricked by stories that start at The Onion. Even the news services have been fooled on occasion.
Scorpia, it was an interesting set of comments, I thought.
Oh, you can’t get me to say a bad word about the Onion. I love them. They’re all over Chicago. 🙂
Now the rumors on http://www.snopes.com
they make me a little crazy.
Oh, I didn’t mean to say anything bad about them. I just think it’s funny when a news service passes along one of their stories because they were too lazy to research it for themselves.
I think they’re very funny.
Oh THAT! I love it when news media don’t pay attention and latch onto an Onion story as if it’s real. Now you’ve got think about another one of my favorites. I’m going to have bring it over here this weekend . . . It’s so funny.
Hi Liz,
Sorry for the delay… timezone thing! Here’s my answer.
There’s this book “Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man” by Dan Anderson and Maggie Berman.
Put a little twist on the blog’s tagline, it might just work. Gay men are more attune to their feminie side yet function (mentally) like any men in a straight (majority) society.
Two for the price of one….Gay man’s POV. Best of all, I don’t need to change my name. Just René! 😉
Renée!
I love how you think! You are charming and mathematical at the same time. It’s lovely. I can hear your voice when you talk. 🙂
Ah, Snopes. Been reading that site for quite awhile now. Great place for debunking any number of rumors, myths, urban legends and such. Anytime you get an email with a rumor, check there first.
Yeah, I’ve been reading Snopes for years too. It’s a hoot if you’re looking for something weird to write about. It’s strange what some people will believe.
I would write the way I write if i signed that contract for 60K. I am still the same person whether I write by a masculine pseudonym or not, that is all I know.
Liz? are you da man? 😉
he he
Am I da man? I’m not sure I’d pass on that one, but don’t you dare say that I throw like a girl!!
LOL- liz he he he.
My boyfriend is teased everyday humourously at work because they (all the men) say he throws like a woman. He works as a carpeneter doing framing for various sized apartment complexes and townhouses. I’ve been bugging him to get the video one of them shot when they were all throwing like woman on the construction site one day poking fun at his throwing.
Canada’s silliest construction site videos — film at 11 tonight only on YouTube!!!
Would I blog as a man? Hell yeah, for 60,000 on any topic. No problemo.
Hey April,
Welcome.
Yeah 60K is pretty tempting. 🙂
60k a year could probably let you show yourself on blogging conferences… i mean if you really care for your work here you could always change your appearance via cosmetic surgery… you would still be yourself, but now others would perceive you as that blogger.
Hi Whoa!
Are you saying that you would have plastic surgery to change your appearance for a 60K/year blogging job?
No way. No knife to my face for a blog. Thank you very much. 🙂
no, i’m just saying that if it’s about going to conventions to get recognition as this person then some alterations (minimal) could be the answer for those who want recognition.
Me? Naah, I am one of those who prefer to remain unknown (kinda shy), so if i would accept and remain … errr … unseen, lol.
Oh OK, Whoa!
Glad to hear you’re safe. 🙂