Indiana Wants Me . . . Lord, I Can’t Go There
Back in the olden days, I was hired as a trainee for the Philips Van-Heusen Shirt Company. I was the first woman on the sales team in Chicago, that made me the second in that role nationwide in the company. During that training year, I was kind of a golden child, I got the systems, taught the guys how to use them, made relationships with customers and partnered well with the big time sales reps. I loved my job.
Then the guy in Indianapolis quit. He had replaced the guy who had quit just months before that. I was too young to think through what that quick change in personnel meant.
My boss offered me that territory ââ¬â- at my six months review — heck, the teritory was even made bigger. That was something. My boss said I didnââ¬â¢t have to go, but he also said that he couldnââ¬â¢t promise Iââ¬â¢d still have a job in Chicago, if I didn’t go.
I didnââ¬â¢t want to go. I love Chicago. I didnââ¬â¢t need the money. I had just bought a condo.
A golden child didn’t say “no,” did she? I felt I had to go. I think I was still worried about teacher approval and following orders. Do the program. Pay my dues. Do what I was supposed to do. I made up a romantic rationale and said “yes.”
Soon enough I was singing that old pop tune, ââ¬ÅIndiana wants me. Lord, I canââ¬â¢t go back there.ââ¬Â
Losing My Sheen
I’d like to say the golden child took the territory by storm, but the reality is that the gold lost its sheen. Lugging samples across two states and sharing a hotel room with 200 hundred stuffed shirts isn’t romantic. They werenââ¬â¢t great conversationalists.
When I got past feeling they were staring at me, I would have crazy dreams about 45 vampires chasing me through a haunted house. They would be dressed in all 45 colors of our new silk shirt. I began to realize I didnââ¬â¢t like being a shirt sales rep away from home. I didn’t like working alone with shirts as company — too much head and not enought heart for me.
The shirts didn’t get much back from me either. I still canââ¬â¢t tell the difference between a nub and a slub in raw silk fabric. They were all just shirts to me. So I guess you might say we were destined to split. . . . and split we did. I left the booming metropolis of Indianapolis and hightailed it back to Chicago. I got a job in an interior design firm and started my career as writer.
So why am I telling you this not so fascinating story?
I should have gone with my intuition. I should have followed what I already knew about myself. Every part of a person knows when something will work and when it won’t.
Listen to your truth. Don’t let your head talk you out of it.
It’s hard to do our best work or to follow our passion when we’re not listening to ourserlves.
–ME “Liz” Strauss
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Liz – this is so true!
I can’t tell you how many times I talked myself into something that I knew wasn’t right for me.
Luckily, those instances have become less freqeunt with age. I suppose getting older has made me less willing to “waste” time on something my gut says won’t work.
It’s still really hard though for me to walk away from a challenge – even if it isn’t the challenge that’s in line with my career goals or my personality!
Great topic.
Ann
Hi Ann,
We know this one well . . .don’t we? 🙂
I still think about relocating across country for something I didn’t want to do. I’m just too nice about some things — don’t worry I’m NOT about others. 🙂
Yeah, I think the challenge is part of the problem, that and the creative problem solving that gives such a charge, oh yeah, and there’s the thrill of new beginnings, did I mention the plain old adventure . . .
Liz,
So true. When I used to train new staff I told them to start trusting their instincts immediately. Even before they had the experience.
Regards,
Glenn
Glenn!
So good to hear from you and what a great point you make.
Every time a book had to be burned for a serious issue that there was always an editor at the table who said “I never felt right about that.”
If someone is waking up at 2 a.m. about something, it’s something worth talking about the next morning!!!
Thanks so much for bringing this point up, Glenn!!
A few times I didn’t listen to my gut, it was because I was caught up in the idea of the money the opportunity offered. Sometimes a challenge was there, sometimes it wasn’t.
Too often early in my career, I made decisions based more on money than on challenge or what felt right to my gut. I always got burned emotionally, mentally, physically. But money was always tight, always an issue, and the opportunity to jump $10K in salary was hard to ignore.
One day I met a 50something woman at a networking event who said she used to be the same way. I asked her how she changed, because I wanted to. She said she changed when she realized that selling herself out for more money on the job didn’t make her much different from the prostitutes in Times Square. When she started thinking about it in term of prostituting herself, she found it hard to do anything but listen to her gut from then on.
Hi Tamara,
What a great story. How can you beat wisdom like that? It takes living it to know.
I call it managing to my comfort zone. I know what’s right for me, no one else does. I can help you find what’s right for you — ask around it’s so. But I can’t tell you what to do. You can do the same for me, I bet. 🙂
Jumping salary at the end of a career ends up feeling pretty hollow, but doing what you were meant to do. WOW!!!
In my opinion, every mature adult has at least once worked for the sake of money and has at least a dozen times failed to listen to their gut feelings.
Because these, we grow and failed and then rise again.
Have a wonderful Christmas, Liz!
BTW, my comment few posts back was eaten up by your Akimet! Hope this won’t!
That yearning for teacher approval and the idea that we must to follow orders is probably what gets most people doing things against their gut. It takes a long time to realize we don’t need to live by the priorities of others.
Hi Renée,
I’m so sorry your words got eaten — you always say such wise things so gently.
Like just now, you’ve defined adulthood with such grace and elegance.
Thank you, Renée. For every word you’ve said.
Hi Carolyn,
How kind you are to recognize that we yearn for the approval of others and that it goes back to our teachers (good and bad). It’s hard to learn that we’re grown when we know that other’s ideas are just opinions compared to our own truth.
You are a wise one, Carolyn.
Liz, I can’t take all the glory. You gave me the teacher-approval prompt.
Carolyn,
You don’t need me to be brilliant. I know that. 🙂
You’re too kind, Liz.
Hi Carolyn,
It’s not kindness to speak the truth, but it’s surely unkindness to let folks believe otherwise. 🙂
Gee, Liz, you’re full of ’em this week! You know that that last comment is begging to go into my quote database.
Well, Carolyn,
I guess that could only be because what you say inspires me. 🙂
You are always welcome to anything I say to you. 🙂
Liz – what a great yet simple story that says so much about human behavior and business. My favorite part is “Listen to your truth. Donââ¬â¢t let your head talk you out of it.” I’ll be referencing this post on my own blog soon – excellent insight!
Hi Raven,
Welcome!
Well, that’s one thing for sure . . . I am human. I have every foible to prove it. 🙂
I’m glad you found what I wrote useful. It’s the reason I put all of it here.
You’re not a stranger anymore. 🙂