Motivation Archives - Page 112 of 146

I'm the Life of the Party . . .

August 22, 2007 by Liz

parties.

Don’t feel bad if I don’t come to your party. It’s not that I don’t want to be with you to celebrate. It’s that parties scare me.

People at parties act differently. They talk differently. They smile party smiles. They chat party chatter. I watch people at parties, and I see them waiting for the fun to begin. It’s intimidating. I end up like Alice in Wonderland at the Tea Party. My words seem to be in another language.

If I get there early, I’m sure the fun hasn’t happened. If I come in the middle, the fun seems to have started without me. I’m not sure how to join in. If I get there too late, the fun seems to be over.

People say, “Hey, here comes the life of the party.” I think, Uh-oh my life is now over. I’m about to do something too big or too foolish.

To me parties are more like the Serengeti than like my natural habitat. Navigating a party is much harder than a photo safari.

It works better, if I don’t call it a party. If I call it a few friends “getting together,” the pressure seems to come off. I can talk to friends without feeling that “fun responsibility.” Friends don’t expect friends to be effervescent and fun every minute, . . . except maybe at a party.

Fun is so elusive and undefinable. I don’t want to be in charge of it. Sometimes I don’t know I’ve had it until I look back long after it’s over.

I know I had fun once, but don’t ask which time it was.

Oh yeah, then that one special party happens . . . when I lose self-consciousness. Fun falls from the sky like stardust on me . . . yeah then, going back to the real world no fun at all.

I guess I pack too much into when the word parties. I wonder whether I’ll ever outgrow that.

Until then, I’ll keep thinking of them as visitng my friends who are getting together for some occasion. Then, I can have a good time and even be entertaining.

Sometimes I can be the life of the party, as long as it’s not a party.

Personal Identity: It's Just a Little Lie

August 21, 2007 by Liz

a little lie.

This weekend I had a conversation with someone who told a little lie. He talked about what I do as if he followed my work each day. He was pretending, guessing. It’s sad to report. His guess was miles away.

“If you’re going to lie to me, please have the decency to be convincing.” Hugh Prather, Jr. said.

I suppose this young man, in his own way, was paying me a compliment. Maybe he wanted me to know he thought I was important. But what he did was say he wasn’t confident that I would be okay if he admitted he never read my work. His problem? Yes. But then he handed it to me.

It’s just a little lie, but what do I do with it?

I’m caught between the truth and embarrassment. In my younger days, I would have gone straight for the truth as gently as I could, thinking that I would save the misperception from continuing. These days I do that less.

I didn’t tell the guy he had it wrong. I figured I can’t fix all of the misperceptions in the world. I figured sooner or later folks who’d hear from him might consider the source.

Have I gotten old and lazy or realistic? Have I quit taking myself so seriously or sold out?

After all, it’s just a little lie.

Change the World: Be Disarming

August 20, 2007 by Liz

The Power of a Smile

Patrick was a 6-year-old white kid, who lived in the inner city — possibly the red light district — he walked to school, where I was a student teacher.

It was a rough school in a rough neighborhood. The kids were full of energy and life. About 700 students filled five classrooms at each grade level from 4 years old (pre-Kindergarten) through 10 years old (5th grade). In that group of students, only 10 kids were Caucasian. The rest of the school was African American. Of those 10 Caucasian kids, 9 of them got beat up or hassled daily. Not Patrick.

I was working on my honors thesis. So I did a histogram. Patrick turned to be the most admired — academically and socially — among his classmates. He was the one they would all ask to a party. He was the would all ask for help with their homework.

What was it about Patrick? Patrick had something special. Everyone liked him.

It was his way of being. It was his attitude about life and himself. It was his charming, disarming smile, that said, “What? Pick on me? I’m a little kid, only six years old. You must be kidding!” Everyone liked Patrick. It was impossible not to.

He soothed the savaged beasts and charmed all of the teachers.

He was bright love and sunshine in the inner city. I smile to remember him.

He was only six years old then, but Patrick is still a role model for me.

We can change the world — just like that.
–ME “Liz” Strauss

Passionate Dots

August 19, 2007 by Liz

Connecting dots with The Idea Dude

For this week’s dots, I chose the theme…

passion

In the true spirit of Liz’s blogpost today, these dots did the most noble thing, they surrendered to their passion. They became Visible, Valuable and Mighty.

When you arrive at one of these dots… it’s like jumping into the ocean from a cliff, you are totally and immediately immersed into their lives, their passion.

I chose these dots because to many readers they will appear to be unconnected, three seemingly unrelated blogs. I connected them not through their subjects but through their hearts.

Ruth is a long-time member of TheGoodBlogs. I’ve admired her consistent posts on food for all seasons. Each post is lovingly crafted with gorgeous pictures that inspires me to run to the kitchen and forget all my incompetencies as a cook. A blogger’s feast with a personal twist.

She even has a worthy competitor to the venerable Klondike bar (hardcore SOBs will know, that Klondike bars on Open Mike Tuesdays at this blog are synonymous to beer at Cheers).

I met Jesse, Gitr, at Sobcon07. He is passionate especially when it comes to the World of Warcraft. Did you know he describes himself as having a 5th degree blackbelt in Microsoft Word! With close to 700 blogposts, he’s far from done and if you’re a gaming nut, you’ll appreciate the dedication and quality of his posts. It’s also why the blog is great, it is about Gitr playing the game not just another game review site. It is life of Gitr in his virtual world. Gitr is the WOW factor.

When you visit Director Tom, there is no doubt that Tom is filmmaker. Scratch the surface and you’ll find Tom is more than the about lights, cameras, action. Those are merely props. He wants to tell your story through his medium and expertise and make it inspiring, personal and emotional. Tom says, My deepest desire is to see these stories help the world become a better and kinder place. That is Tom’s real passion. He wants to make us say, Let’s See That Again!

I get the sense that as long as they breathe and have a keyboard nearby, these dots will not go gently into the night. They will rage forever…

because they are simply mirrors of the souls who feed them.

May the dots be with you!

Vern, The Idea Dude

Click here to see more dots we connected

Surrender Dorothy . . . Visible, Valuable, and Mighty

August 19, 2007 by Liz

about surrendering.

In the Wizard of OZ when Dorothy and her companions — The Scarecrow, The Tin Woodsman, and The Cowardly Lion — leave the Wash and Brush Up Shop in the Emerald City, they see the Wicked Witch of the West use her broom to write these words across the sky.

SURRENDER DOROTHY

Anyone, who’s seen the movie or read the books, knows that Dorothy was dreaming the story and that the characters were people from her life. You could say that, like the rest of us, Dorothy was solving a problem in her unconscious while she slept. That thought makes me wonder . . .

What if Dorothy’s mind was talking TO her, not ABOUT her.

The original phrase was intended to be “Surrender Dorothy or Die, WWW.”

Surrender or Die.

Since I was so very short, the word surrender has meant failure. I’ve only now begun to see it as something brave.

I think of the struggles I’ve fought to prove myself. It’s been a continuous battle to keep from giving myself away. So many times I held my ground, when no one was trying to take it. How could I see that, when I didn’t look in their direction? Championing my needs — to feel visible, valuable, and mighty — was a full-time job. It seemed a good fight.

Surrendering is harder than fighting.

Surrender? Never.

To surrender I have to lay down the defense that protects me. If I let go, I can’t lean on my pain. I can’t lean on my past. I can’t rely on them to explain when I wasn’t at my best. I’m back to learning about life again. Risks.

Surrendering is easier than fighting.

Sure, some fool, some jerk could rush in to knock me down, but they do that anyway. I’m not an inexperienced child. I can choose how close to let them come.

To me it only makes sense that to give up the fight, Dorothy had to make friends with courage, heart, and brains.

“Surrender Dorothy.”

“There’s no place like home.”

Courage, heart, and brains. OZ let us know we all have them. Can we bear to believe that we’re visible, valuable, and mighty?

Surrender myself.

Introducing the Gracious Ones . . .

August 17, 2007 by Liz

the gracious ones.

This one is for those who seem to be always smiling. They ask a favor and if we forget, they understand with generosity. They offer their friendship without catch, no strings attached. They are the kids who’ll play any position on the team because they so enjoy being a part of what’s going on.

The rest of us, we’re all a little too busy sometimes. They don’t mind. The gracious ones wait for us.

The rest of us, we’re cranky sometimes. They don’t mind. The gracious ones don’t even seem to notice.

And when we come to our senses and say that we’re glad to have them around, the gracious ones somehow make it seem like we’re the special ones.

The gracious ones allow us to overlook them.

Just because they don’t demand our attention, it doesn’t mean they don’t deserve it.

I know one gracious lady. She’s often comes to visit here. She rarely asks for anything. She defines compassion, hardwork, and kindess. Her smile is bigger than the Internet. Her heart is bigger than that. She likes to laugh.

Her name is Marti Lawrence.

Would you introduce me to a gracious one that you know?