11 Comments to “Pretty Is . . . Do You Make Assumptions?”

1. March 9th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
   Anthony Lawrence said

   Hmmm..

   Well, why are they good looking? Sure, they have some physical advantages, but they also are keeping their hair groomed, wearing neat and clean clothing, shaving carefully, some wearing contacts instead of glasses.. they do not HAVE to be as attractive as they are. It is possible to tone yourself down to a much more plain look if you are blessed/cursed with good looks.

   Reminds me: my wife is on her way home – I better go shave and fix my hair

2. March 9th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
   Mother Earth said

   i have a friend who is drop dead gorgeous and she speaks to how she has always been treated differently – always

   my daughter too, kids think she’s a snob or something – then she cracks some joke to remind them hey she’s just like they are, yet she has always had to work harder at it

3. March 10th, 2008 at 4:11 am
   Stephen Hopson said

   Hi Liz:

   I didn’t understand everything they were saying because it wasn’t subtitled but I got the gist of it.

   It made me realize how even gorgeous looking people have it tough and that those people who are considered ‘average’ looking who think the grass is greener on the other side with better looks don’t realize that it isn’t necessarily so.

   Interesting perspective.

4. March 10th, 2008 at 5:56 am
   Karin H. said

   they do not HAVE to be as attractive as they are.

   Like very smart people ‘dumming’ themselves down to get accepted?
   They are attractive and they (above example) are smart – why can’t we accept that as a fact?

   Or is it that we feel ‘less’?

   Karin H. (Keep It Simple Sweetheart, specially in business)

5. March 10th, 2008 at 6:10 am
   Anthony Lawrence said

   @Karin

   We can accept it as a fact – but apparently some of the people in that video can’t.

   I do exactly what I suggested because I am “good looking” enough to attract attention I don’t want. I wear my thick glasses most of the time and leave the contacts in the cabinet. I barely comb my hair and let my shirts be wrinkled – and it works (mostly). If they don’t like the attention they get, they could do the same.

   And yes, sometimes “smart people” have to dumb down. I adopt both vocabulary and content to the people I am with. A conversation with my sister is markedly different than a conversation with my neighbor. I’m quite sure all “smart people” do the same.

6. March 11th, 2008 at 8:02 pm
   ME Liz Strauss said

   Hi Anthony, Karin, Stephen,

   What moves about this video is how we judge other people on essentially no information.

   AND

   How we accept those judgments other people make.

   So what!!!??? So what??!!

   So what if I’m gorgeous or not?
   So what if I’m brilliant or not?

   What makes me really attractive is if I realize that I’m okay with myself.

   All of these people accepted what other people made them feel . . . Why did they give those other people such power?

7. March 12th, 2008 at 2:44 am
   Karin H. said

   Why did they give those other people such power?

   Amen to that.

   Karin H.

8. March 12th, 2008 at 5:56 am
   Anthony Lawrence said

   “Why did they give those other people such power?”

   Most of us are genetically or sociologically wired to care deeply about what other people think. We wouldn’t be human if we were not.

9. March 12th, 2008 at 6:05 am
   Karin H. said

   That’s true Anthony, but isn’t it also true that genetically and/or sociologically we’re wired to ‘look-out-for-number-one’ or even ‘the survival of the fittest’?

   I care about what people think of me, but I care to make sure it’s based on the correct issues – not the first impression. So I make an effort to show them what and who I really am. That is ‘my power’ – not theirs.

   Karin H.

10. March 12th, 2008 at 6:37 am
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Anthony!
    I agree that we are inclined to adjust to what other folks think, but I also think we need to be aware that we do. Sometimes we hand over what we think of ourselves without knowing that we’re doing it. That’s not good. Our opinion of ourselves isn’t something other folks need to decide for us.

11. March 12th, 2008 at 6:39 am
    ME Liz Strauss said

    Hi Karin!
    I think you bring up a key point. Other folks can be basing their idea of whom we might be on not enough information. If we agree with what they see, we’re doing ourselves a disservice. I think most folks would agree with you on that.