truth Archives - Successful Blog

And Not Think About Motives

For those who come looking for a short, thoughtful read, a blogging life discussion, or a way to gradually ease back into the week. I offer this bloggy life question. . . .

You had a casual conversation with a group of friends about telling the truth. All of you agreed that truth is important to a relationship.

Then the question of the middle ground came up.

Someone asked, “What do you do when someone asks your opinion of their blog, and you think that it’s really bad?”

One of your friends answers, “Hey that’s easy, you tell the truth and make it sound like a lie. You talk with exaggeration while smiling, and say something like, ‘Ooh your writing is SO incredibly boring and below level, that it makes even you want to think of 1,000 ways to die.’ Then you laugh and smile. It’s the truth, but the person won’t believe you. The question is over and you’re safe again.”

Another friend says, “That’s deception. It’s the same as a lie.”

How do you respond?

–ME “Liz” Strauss

feelings, truth, and potential.

At age 20, I used to get tied up in knots about who I was. I wanted to be authentic, true to myself in every action, every feeling, every breath that I took.

Part of the problem was that I lived in my head. I over-thought the idea.

I understood that it’s rare to feel one emotion purely. Love, joy, happiness, a bit of fear, some nostalgia, a touch of kindness, or maybe a bit of insecurity, anger, forgiveness, compassion; some understanding, some hurt, some sadness, love unrequited, other “stuff” — emotions seem to come mostly in groups that can’t be sorted out.

I wondered if I feel 10% forgiveness and 60% hurt is the forgiveness any less me? Couldn’t I choose to focus on either one and still be true to who I am?

That’s when I would get confused. I had no metric to decide which feeling to go with. If I chose a “positive” feeling or one that is other-centered was I being a “people pleaser”? If I chose a “negative” one, was I being selfish?

I was only 20. I didn’t have much life experience from which to draw. It was probably frustration that made me realize that my focus on the present was keeping me confounded. Finally, I looked to the future.

Once my focus turned to Who do I want to be? Being true to myself suddenly became easy.

When I need a decision on how to act, I put my faith in the person I want to be. What would she do? How would she feel about this? The person I aspire to become became my role model and my counsel.

My truth became firmly footed in the other-centered person I hope to become. My journey found a direction and a purpose, a heading toward the person I could possibly be. I’ll never reach her, because every moment I imagine that potential as slightly more.

It’s the knowing that I’m going in the right direction that counts.

How do you find personal truth? How do you reach for your potential?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Check out the Work with Liz!! page in the sidebar.

Bloggy Question 82: It's the Truth, Well, Sort of . . .

And Not Think About Motives

Personal Identity: Being True to Yourself