December 27, 2006

About Spam in my Spam Filter

ME Liz Strauss wrote this at 6:06 am

Today It Was 309

Every morning as one of my start up routines I sift through my spam filter — to remove false positives. It’s bad enough that comments get caught there. I don’t want them to get eaten.

This spam cleaning ritual is extending my horizon.

I meeting some interesting people.

  • spammers with unusual names — Best regards
  • alien spammers with names I cannot pronounce — ixfwq.
  • lazy spammers whose sole message is one character — 2 or x, or /
  • efficient spammers who can pack what seems like 10,000 links into one message
  • spammers who try flattery “Thanks, guy, for a great site!” They tend to assume I’m a guy or amigo.
  • spammers who pretend to be looking for information
  • spammers who lie outright, “Great site. I’m bookmarking it right now!”
  • spammers who apologize “Sorry, but I need the money.”
  • shy spammers who only leave links without a message
  • celebrities who take to time spam me

I know where to go to find

  • hotel rooms available around the world
  • play poker
  • learn blackjack
  • win at slots
  • enjoy all of the amenities of a casino online
  • a range of pharmaceuticals
  • a variety of physical . . um, er . . . enhancements

In another life when I change my ringtone, I’ll have to try the one that sounds like a mosquito.

Spammers can teach how to get a mortgage loan, get the best shoes, finance my car, spruce up my blog, find quotes and other useful information. I can get enrolled for a college education, learn to garden, fix my home, and get household insurance. This past two weeks lead to a whole list of prom dresses and christmas list ideas. It’s a regular spam shopping mall behind my front page.

Then there’s the porn, oh my! Please someone write a plug in with parental controls for spam catchers. I’m not sure I’m old enough to read the titles in the name lines. I know I’m not ready for Granny’s sex life, but cartoon porn! C’mon I’m a visual thinker . . . I can do without images of Mickey and Minnie at 4:30a.m.!

I imagine great uses for this technology when I think as a mother. Clean out all of that ad spam and let me leave messages for my own and my kid’s spam dash board . . . mine would be filled with my calendar. His would be gentle reminders that said . . .

  • Sweeheart, clean your room.
  • Darling, don’t forget that spelling test.
  • Tuesday is take out the trash day. You’re so good at that!
  • Excuse me, the dishes are still waiting for you in the kitchen.
  • Remember, Mr. Streetwise, that gorgeous girl you’re talking to online (w00h00t!) — I know you showed me the photo –could really be a 65-year-old ugly, wrinkly online predator with one eye, a tattoo, and a taste for boys who don’t like to take out the trash or clean the kitchen.
  • Hey Guy, you have a dentist appointment on Wednesday.
  • Dad’s birthday is coming up. Have you decided yet what to get him?
  • Honey, change your underwear.
  • Ok, Mastermind, time for bed.

Now that’s spam that any mother could love.

Don’t get me wrong. I think spam is evil, but a nice girl can dream of a better day . . . can’t she? I’m still working on some sort of copywriting game using the spam ads as examples of bad advertising. If you have ideas email me. . . .

–ME “Liz” Strauss


Filed under Business Life, Successful Blog, Tools |



C'mon. Let's talk!

30 Comments to “About Spam in my Spam Filter”

  1. December 27th, 2006 at 7:46 am
    Jesse said

    I like the spam that says that my article makes good “since” to them. I must see those every day.

  2. December 27th, 2006 at 7:48 am
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Jesse,
    Yeah, I get those too! I get few others with “creative” spelling. They make laugh. That’s about all they’re good for.

    Ever stop to think that WE HAVE BECOME THEIR MARKET?

  3. December 27th, 2006 at 7:54 am
    Jesse said

    We ARE the only ones that read them now. If you don’t have AKISMET, you don’t have a blog. :)

  4. December 27th, 2006 at 8:06 am
    ME Strauss said

    I’m laughing. Spam Karma might argue with you on that point. :)

  5. December 27th, 2006 at 8:08 am
    Frank said

    A spam game! What a fantastic idea!

    I’d love to play a part in this. What do you currently have in mind?

  6. December 27th, 2006 at 8:19 am
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Frank,
    Welcome!
    I’ve been thinking on the spam thing for a while and I can’t get the twist yet. I’m open to all ideas . . .

  7. December 27th, 2006 at 8:36 am
    Jesse said

    We could spam each other until someone blushes. ;)

  8. December 27th, 2006 at 8:42 am
    ME Strauss said

    We can’t do anythint that promotes spam . . . spam is evil. It’s just got to be fun!

  9. December 27th, 2006 at 8:47 am
    Jesse said

    Hmmm… I only got 87 spam yesterday, but I also have Bannage installed. I could turn it off, and we could all post our numbers for a week. Winner takes all, spam that is.

    Dorky, but minimal work. LOL

  10. December 27th, 2006 at 8:51 am
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Jesse,
    You couldn’t compete with my numbers. I get 100 or so in an hour. That’s why coming up with a game is hard and I haven’t done it yet. :)

  11. December 27th, 2006 at 8:58 am
    Frank said

    I get about 400/day. Most all is caught by my software but, as ME states “spammers are evil” and they continually work at attempting to confuse spam filters so, I do on occasion peak into my spam folder to see if I’ve missed anything. The whole mess is just so costly to everyone! (I get so very frustrated each time I peak into that folder, and I don’t know why I do it?) I guess it’s human nature to not want to “miss” anything. . urg!!!

  12. December 27th, 2006 at 9:00 am
    Frank said

    Oh my goodness. You trump me in a big way. How do you cope?

  13. December 27th, 2006 at 9:26 am
    Chris Cree said

    Liz, lest you forget the deluge of Christmas theme spam that was going around. That’s beyond evil in my book.

    Apparently over at my place I am very much in need of insurance for my mobile home. Funny, I didn’t realize I lived in a trailer. :roll:

  14. December 27th, 2006 at 9:29 am
    TechZ said

    If you use WordPress, SpamKarma2+BadBehavior2 is a must.

    If you use gmail, they do a splendid job of blocking all the spam, false positives are rare.

    If you use outlook or thunderbird or any e-mail client there are good in-built or addon spam filters that use white/black lists to protect against known spam.

    I get caught in your spam filter alot, its mostly because of my ISP’s poor setup, and they use a proxy server.

  15. December 27th, 2006 at 10:03 am
    Scorpia said

    Liz, you’re just too popular ;)

    Fortunately, so far, I don’t get a lot of spam. Most of it comes with multiple links (along with “Great work!”, “Good job!”, etc. one-liners) and is easily caught.

    Then there’s the occasional post that slips under the radar, with one link. I usually catch those by looking at “Recent Comments”.

    There’s really nothing good about spam. Now, if we could just find a way to send all that junk back to those who send it out. That’s the sort of game I’d be interested in.

  16. December 27th, 2006 at 10:12 am
    ME Strauss said

    Hi all!
    I like Scorpia’s idea to “Return to Sender.” Maybe we include a copy of the Elvis song with it as a present. :)

  17. December 27th, 2006 at 11:32 am
    franky said

    Oh my… return to sender will kill your own mailbox, server. Do you really want all those bounced mails?

    I liked what Jessica did with her spam.
    One thing I would love is that Google/Gmail would finally come up with a way to sort spam by language. I can’t read what a great items I don’t have if the spam is Chinese!

  18. December 27th, 2006 at 12:14 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Aw Franky, I just like the idea in concept! I wouldn’t really do it. :)

  19. December 27th, 2006 at 3:10 pm
    candice said

    TechZ, not for everyone on gmail they’re not. I get a lot of false positives and false negatives. It’s still not good enough to ignore the spam folder for some of us, sadly. It traps business emails in the spam folder for me which is incredibly annoying, because when you un-mark it, it doesn’t forward it on in regular forward rules.

  20. December 27th, 2006 at 3:26 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Oh Candiice,
    That sounds really annoying. I don’t have that problem, but I can imagine it! Ouch!

  21. December 27th, 2006 at 4:01 pm
    John Richardson said

    I like the old Monty Python ditty… spam, spam, spam! Can you imagine having to manually delete all the spam without Spam-Karma… yikes.

    Now if we could just get those spammers to click on our ads and buy our products… then I wouldn’t feel so bad.

    jOHHn ReechaArds0n

    P.S. this will probably cause a bounce into the spam filter :-)

  22. December 27th, 2006 at 4:03 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hi John!
    I’m with you on the wish that they would click on our stuff. Maybe John Cleese would stop by to help us!

  23. December 27th, 2006 at 9:16 pm
    Frank said

    ME,

    As I read through most any rant on spam, sooner or later someone mentions how it impacts personal cost/value and wouldn’t it be nice to somehow get the spammer to foot this bill.

    I reviewed your site earlier today and thought (hum!) I think it would be great to have a chat (one of your daily blogger chats that is).

    You see, I’m an entrepreneur that has focused most every one of my efforts on leveling the playing field for the underdog (from the consumer, to k-12 education, to the environment). I’m not really a technologist as much as I am a marketer. Selling is my passion and happy customers are the key to my success. (And boy, can spammers get customers out of bed on the wrong side monitor or what?)

    So, I joined a team of developers back 2002 to develop an unstoppable anti-spam concept. Different from all the tech solutions out there, this one puts the consumer in (what I call) the Personal Value Control drivers seat. Back in 2002 everyone told me I was nuts and that spam could be addressed with many different technological hoopla approaches. (But, like the old saying goes - if they don’t think you’re crazy then it’s probably not as good an idea as you thought! I met attended one of Seth’s seminars in NY and he is great, even he told me I was nuts!)

    With spam the problem truly is (one mans spam is another persons ham), as you can see by Candice’s posting regarding gmail (I’ve heard this comment about gmail often.)

    What Spam is, is a social problem of ill respect. We all know just how valuable free communications can be (look at how email has changed the world - an now here comes VoIP - and I will predict within 2yrs you will have instant P2P video), but on the flip side, low cost communications allows everyone and their sister to reach-out to me and drop me a line, while I foot the cost of clean-up, protection, and frustration of possible missed messages!

    So, how do we fix it? It’s simple actually, and the grass roots movement to empower consumers over the value of their digital space has already begun - disguised as an anti-spam product.

    When you have a chance, please poke around http://www.respect101.com and tell me if you are interested in chatting.

    Cheers!

  24. December 27th, 2006 at 10:22 pm
    Scorpia said

    Franky, I meant that literally. Just imagine you could trace the spam back to its actual origination point…and then direct all those unwanted emails there.

    If we could do that, my guess is the spam problem would vanish overnight.

  25. December 27th, 2006 at 10:29 pm
    franky said

    Scorpia, the originating point is most of time not that hard to find and I surely have thought several times about this, because spam is often a reason of high serverloads. But problem is that the originating email address most of time a spoof addy is and your return mail will bounce back.

    But in the same thought stream, a thing I have started doing on my (personal) blogs, is to loop feed content grabbers in their own feed. That is a technique which still is possible and if everyone would do this, the feed content grabbing problem would disappear over night. ;-)

  26. January 2nd, 2007 at 11:27 am
    Dustin said

    I have to agree with Jesse. Since I started using Akismet, I no longer really worry about. I have never had a false positive or a false negative, which is good. There are days that it blocks >50 entries.

  27. January 2nd, 2007 at 12:44 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Hi Dustin,
    I wish I was that kind of “lucky.” I have great friends who post here regularly who live in countries where they aren’t allowed secure proxies and so they are automatically pushed to Akisment. I wake up to over 300 spam often. My baby blog yesterday was getting 50 spam an hour. It’s not fun to have to waste time removing them. :)

  28. January 2nd, 2007 at 6:13 pm
    franky said

    Liz, the fastest way to remove/check your Akismet spam, is to grab the Search status plugin for Firefox.
    Once installed, activate highlight NoFollow links when scanning your spam and you’ll see that all the links get a pink background (to indicate NoFollow).
    This is what I have found the fastest way to scan through the spam.
    Within seconds you’ll be able to scroll down locating the few entries without/only one or 2 links.

  29. January 2nd, 2007 at 7:03 pm
    ME Strauss said

    Thanks Franky!
    I’ll give a try. You’re a real pal. Anything that helps is a real deal. :)

  30. January 28th, 2007 at 7:32 am
    Liz Strauss at Successful Blog - Holy Spam! Batman! said

    [...] Related About Spam in my Spam Filter About Logging in to Leave Comments . . . [...]

Name (required)

Email (required)

Website

C'mon Let's Talk!