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Better Than Hi! How Are Ya?

April 24, 2006 by Liz Leave a Comment

Conversation Starter

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The first step in getting to know anyone is conversation. Sometimes though, conversation doesn’t come so naturally. It’s no fun to find yourself in a situation with nothing to say for whatever reason. I keep myself armed with a question or two that I can pull out on those occasions.

A great “getting-to-know-someone” question has three critical traits.

  • It’s open-ended to get the other person talking.
  • The responder can choose what to reveal.
  • No implied judgment or right answer is hidden within it.

The question I use most often when I want to spark conversation is this one.

So, what do you do when you’re not doing this?

I’ve had fabulous conversations with CEOs, cab drivers, hair dressers, and once with another person stuck in a elevator. I’ve always parted those conversations feeling like I’ve made a friend.

Got any conversation starters that you use?

–ME “Liz” Strauss

Related articles
Customer Think: Saying Things without Talking
There’s No Putting ME in a Box
Do You Know a Customer When You See One?

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Filed Under: Customer Think, Marketing /Sales / Social Media, Strategy/Analysis, Successful Blog Tagged With: bc, Customer Think, customer_think, networking, personal_branding, personal-branding, promotion

Comments

  1. Jack says

    April 24, 2006 at 10:46 PM

    Hi liz,
    How come you never asked ME “So, what do you do when you’re not doing this?” question??
    well i don’t remember any conversation starter but since you have asked me so nicely so I have one very cool tip to keep the conversation going – Liz, you just have to use other person’s names in your conversation. Simple. you like it Liz ;-p. well actually it works best when that person can hear you because what he/she would like to hear more then his/her name. What do you think Liz, am I right?

    Reply
  2. ME Strauss says

    April 24, 2006 at 10:50 PM

    Hi Jack,
    I think using someone’s name is a really good idea. First of all it helps you remember what it is. Though I know that you can use someone’s name too much and that can bother people a bit. So I’d be a little careful.

    I wouldn’t think that you would do that, Jack, but some folks sure do.

    So, Jack what DO you do when you’re not doing this?

    Liz.

    Reply
  3. Jack says

    April 25, 2006 at 12:40 AM

    I am glad you asked me liz, well apart from blogging I eat and sleep. And yes, sometimes I go to office to get my checks – they call me system administrator or something like that, i don’t care much but Liz it helps me pay my bills. 🙂

    Reply
  4. Anthony says

    April 25, 2006 at 2:30 AM

    I think in one of the first ever post of yours that I commented in you straight away asked me who are you?. I liked that. No one ever asks you that on the internet.

    I really don’t have a standard conversation starter though I do like the one you just mentioned. With people my own age it’s usually what’s doing? and with mates recently I’ve been asking straight out when I first see them in a day start this sentence just to get that awkward pause before they take me somewhere in conversation really cool. In business enviroment I’ve got nothing. Usually meeting people at cafes regarding work or at rugby games I have more than enough to talk about.

    Reply
  5. ME Strauss says

    April 25, 2006 at 4:31 AM

    Hi Jack,that’s good to know. Then I won’t be offering you other people’s help. I can figure you know what’ you’re doing. In fact you’re IT!

    Reply
  6. ME Strauss says

    April 25, 2006 at 4:35 AM

    Hey Anthony,
    The fun part about this sentence is that it doesn’t necessarily mean work, and so the answers that come back are uniue and wonderful, because people look to find interesting ways to answer it. Even when they say “eat and sleep.” You can “Ah, I do that too, once in a while, but I prefer to rob banks and tak hostages.”

    Stuff like that gets a conversation going. 🙂

    Reply
  7. Chris Cree says

    April 25, 2006 at 5:04 AM

    Liz,
    You are absolutely right. It doesn’t matter if the conversation ends up being about work. The take-away is that it is about making a connection. If a connection is made, it will most likely help work too.

    Talk about a simple yet powerful tool to hang on our belts! Thanks.

    Reply
  8. Jack says

    April 25, 2006 at 7:51 AM

    other people’s help? “scratching my head”
    Liz I believe that no one is perfect in this world and everyone can use some help and good advice once in a while. But then I dont have to worry too much about getting help because I have friends like you.

    Reply
  9. ME Strauss says

    April 25, 2006 at 7:53 AM

    You’re right there, Jack. Friends are a good thing to have, and you’ve got one right here when you need one. 🙂

    Reply
  10. DavidC says

    April 25, 2006 at 9:21 AM

    [he he]
    Stuck in an elevator, asking that question… made me laugh…

    Thanks, I’ll remember this one.

    Reply
  11. ME Strauss says

    April 25, 2006 at 9:25 AM

    Yeah, we were in a glass elevator low enough to the ground. People couldn’t see in, but they sure tried to. It felt a little like being in a zoo. I was 45 minutes late for a meeting. Boy howdy did I have a good reason. 😛

    Reply

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