Simple Is Lovely
I was considering sending in a piece when you first mentioned the makeover but had forgotten about it. Since getting your reply I’ve picked out a piece and would like to submit it. The little girl in this story taught me something so I’d like to do the story justice.
Thanks in advance,
This is such a lovely story. I was inspired by the Buscaglia book, too. I also hold high respect for the perceptions of children and what they can teach us. I understand what you mean about doing this story justice. The little girl you tell about is a special one.
With those thoughts in mind, I made my edits. I worked to the spirit of the story, and that led me to alter some facts to put things in order that people might imagine them.
I removed many words to make the story simpler and more powerful. That was to underscore your respect for this young child as a teacher.
I tried to stay close to your writing voice. Only you can judge whether I succeeded at at that.
I may not have made all of the choices that you would have made, but I hope this points you in the direction you’re looking to go.
Remember, as always, this is only one way to edit it! Every editor edits differently.
Turn the page to look over my shoulder as I do the editorial makeover. It’s called, “A Simple Story” [Read more…]