Successful Blog

First things first; 5 tips for online relationship building

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A Guest Post by
Rosemary O’Neill

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365 Days of Gratitude

Building a lasting online relationship is a lot like building a fire. You must lay down kindling, and shavings, and a little teepee of sticks, and patiently fan the little spark into flames. Then eventually, you can add the big logs, set them aflame, and warm yourself. If you need a fire that will last a long time, you’ll want glowing coals that will produce serious heat. Building that type of fire takes time.

Following this line of thought, do you think it’s a good method to pile up a bunch of briquets, douse them with lighter fluid, and blow your eyebrows off?

That’s the mistake a lot of well-intentioned people make when they enter the social media world. They try to force a relationship out of nothing, from the merest contact, and then they’re disappointed when it explodes in their face or doesn’t ever catch fire.

Here are five tips that will save your eyebrows:

1. Don’t keep asking for the “like.” If they like you, they will “like” you when they’re ready.

2. If someone follows you back on Twitter, don’t go hunt them down on 50 other social networks and follow them immediately. Establish some rapport on the first network, then you can branch out by mutual consent.

3. Stop the auto-reply that demands something from your new visitor (read my blog, visit my Facebook page, buy my new e-book). Instead, give a human welcome.

4. Always read a blog or forum for a week or two before you plunge into commenting; it will give you a sense of the tone and style of the community.

5. Just as in face-to-face relationship building, be interested in order to be interesting. Ask questions, listen, and then focus your replies on the person you’re talking with. Drop the agenda and make a true connection.

If you take the long term approach, your sparks of connection will light up the world.
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Author’s Bio: Rosemary O’Neill is an insightful spirit who works for social strata — a top ten company to work for on the Internet . Check out their blog. You can find her on Twitter as @rhogroupee

Do You Know How to Hire Talent?

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While many small businesses have found themselves having to freeze new-hires or even let people go given the turbulent economy, others have been fortunate enough to bring on new employees.

Stop, however, and look at your hiring processes. Are they really where they need to be?

For too many companies, there are cracks in the armor when it comes to hiring the right employees.

As a small business owner, do you follow a formal process when it comes to bringing on new talent or have you been winging it for some time now?

In the event it is the latter, here are some tips to help smooth out the process:

  • What is the proposed duration of this employee? – Businesses need to decide if they will be seeking a long-term employee or just need a temporary fix. If hiring for the long-term, factor in things like higher salaries and benefits. If you just need workers for a few weeks or months, working through a temp agency is oftentimes the best solution. Temp agencies allow you to avoid the interview and hiring process, but keep in mind that that can sometimes be a bad thing;
  • How many interviews should I do with the same individual? – For many companies, the interview process is one and done, while others who like a candidate will bring them in for two or more interviews. Determine how important the position being advertised for is and go from there. That is not to say that you should not care about the quality work of an administrative assistant as opposed to a CEO, but obviously the CEO is going to be coming in with more credentials and expectations;
  • How much emphasis should I put towards gaps on a resume? – For some businesses looking to hire, seeing non-working gaps on someone’s resume signal red flags. While some of these breaks between jobs can be easily explained away, do not hesitate to ask candidates why they have a year or more between jobs. Whether it was a layoff, a break to go back to school, taking care of a loved one or raising a family, most employers will understand. Still, don’t leave this to fate if you’re wondering why someone has not worked for several years;
  • Can you spot a red flag? – Oftentimes an interview will come and go so quickly that you or your HR person or whoever was conducting the process misses something. Be sure to check out if the candidate appears confident, has good communication skills and seems energetic about the position. Body language can go a long way in determining if you may be hiring the right or wrong individual;
  • Quiz the individual about your company – While a candidate is not likely to know every intricate detail about your small business, they should know some of the basics by having done some research. Do you really want someone potentially working for your company that doesn’t know anything about you other than your company name and address? Job candidates should take the time prior to the interview to research the company’s Web site and see how they can best assist you in the proposed position;
  • Be prepared just like the candidate hopefully is – There is nothing more embarrassing for the company and the employee conducting the job interview than not being prepared. Just as you want the candidate to bring their ‘A’ game; you too need to be ready. Have a list of questions compiled regarding the candidate, how they see themselves helping the company, where they see themselves in a few years etc. Just as an ill-prepared candidate can lose out on a job possibility, you being unprepared for the interview can lead to a well-qualified prospective candidate taking a pass on your job offer.

Hiring the right people for your small business is in a way like finding the right seats on the bus for all the students.

In this case, you are looking to hire the best fit for the open position, something that too many companies are not very talented at.

Dave Thomas, who covers among other items starting a small business and business proposals, writes extensively for Business.com, an online resource destination for businesses of all sizes to research, find, and compare the products and services they need to run their businesses.

4 Steps to a Job When You Graduate

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A Guest Post by
Darren McCloskey

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Fully Prepare

Dissertations have been handed in and the months until graduation are quickly slipping past – but what next? It won’t be long until graduates start out on their intrepid job hunting adventures and companies begin to snap them up into employment. It’s now time to sit back and begin to plan your next steps. Finding a job is a time investment and you’re going to need to be fully prepared. Thankfully, we’ve created an expert guide on graduate job seeking so you know how to move onto the next stage of your life.

The Bottom isn’t so scary

For those of you are who are lucky enough to know what you want to do in the future, the best first step to take is to make note of organisations you would love to work for. Whether it’s because they offer high wages or just seems to have the best cultural fit, make a list of them all and spend some time looking up the various roles they offer. If there aren’t any at your graduate level, look at roles that are lower down – even if this means starting at the bottom. If you can show passion and a great work ethic at lower levels, why would they hire someone else when an opening for your ideal role appears?

Head to your chosen employers website and try to glean some information regarding their recruitment process. If they use a particular recruiter, make note of their name or find out the names of the in house recruitment team members. Remember not to dismiss any role that you can apply for – it’s not just a job but a networking opportunity, a valuable asset when only 40% of jobs are openly advertised to job seekers.

Internships aren’t always Unpaid

While unpaid internships seem to be floating around at an increasing rate, there are ways to make them work for you if you don’t live at home or have savings to support yourself. Internships are a valuable way to get work experience and gather a number of industry contacts for later use in your career. If you can’t manage to work unpaid for a month or so, ask if you can work on a part time basis, so you can balance unpaid work with another paid part time job. Even asking for an afternoon every week to do some work experience will be beneficial to you in the long run and allow you to get a grasp of job roles and contacts in the industry.

There’s Plenty out There

There’s a whole industry of recruiters devoted to placing graduates into suitable roles, so don’t fret, there’s definitely a job out there for you. Of course, there may be a higher amount of competition for certain roles, but determination and persistence can get you anywhere. On average it takes around 60 job applications to get an interview or two, but if you’re still struggling to hear anything then perhaps you should consider getting your CV checked over, or downloading a new CV template.

Your university should offer careers advice and set you on the right track. They may even advise you on contacts they have so you can call up for an impromptu chat or networking events that you can attend to widen your horizons.

Always make sure you have thoroughly researched the company that you’re sending an application to. Considering the amount of competition your application might have, it’s best to be right the first time and show you have commitment to learning more. For instance, looking up potential colleagues on LinkedIn or finding their blogs online will be another point you can cover in future interviews and make you memorable.

Companies want to know about YOU

Reports have shown that the quality of applications that employers have received has improved. Graduates have proven to be adept at answering competency based questions but seem to falter when it comes to what motivates them! Beware of tricky questions such as “Where do you see yourself in five years time?” and “Why do you want this role with us?” as questions such as these cannot be blagged. They require preparation and a thought as to what your goals in life are. Once you have an interview set some time to sit down and go through as many possible questions you can think of. Make sure you know what you want and why you want it – if you can’t explain why you want a job, why should they give it to you?

So there you have it, four simple pieces of priceless advice to get you on your way to graduate employment.

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Author’s Bio:
Darren McCloskey is a freelance writer working within the recruitment section with the people of monster to help promote how employment agencies can help find engineering jobs

Thank you, Darren!

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!

Choosing and Deciding: How Do You Sort a Path to Opportunity?

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Knowing the Right Path

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It’s the end of what’s been not the best year. The economy is still uncertain. History tells us that it’s times like these that great leaders and great business are born. Inside and outside of traditional business, people are finding their path to opportunity, showing up with their skills, and claiming their reward.

Survey the landscape and three groups stand out.

  • People who are following a path to opportunity set out by someone else.
  • People who are forging their own path to opportunity.
  • People who can’t seem to find a path to be on.

Which group describes what you’re doing?
What are the first two groups doing that the third group is not?

Choosing and Deciding: The Key to Sorting a Path to Opportunity

Every change, every cycle, every downturn and upturn in the economy offers opportunity. The question is how do you find the best opportunity for you, your business, and your team? No matter the economy, we see old and new companies succeeding — How did SAS in Cary, NC get to be #1 on CNN’s 100 Best Companies list? How does Zappos keep growing their happiness business? … and individuals who are doing the same thing. — How did Susan Gregg turn her closet into a $50 Million business? How did Michael Mothner turn a tough interview question into a $12-13 Million business?

How did those folks find success how did they figure out where they’re going and stay true to that?

Obviously every business and individual who’s enjoying success has sorted and found their unique path to opportunity.
Key to that success — leveraging opportunity — is understanding the difference between choosing and a deciding and know when do each. What kind of choosing and deciding sorts the world of possibilities so that we can get on to that same sort of success?

When the Possibilities Are Endless You Need to Choose

Naturally the first step is defining and describing our unique version of success. If the possibilities seem endless, then you need to start with choosing.

Choosing allows us to try alternatives. The origins of the word choose are in French and German words that literally mean to taste or to test. A choice is what happens when we survey a box of chocolates knowing that whichever we take now, we’ll return later to take another one. The choice is a selection that resembles a bungie cord – make a choice, enjoy it, and bounce back to make another version of that choice again. We can choose more than one, even if we’re choosing one at a time.

If you’re choosing, do this.

  • Start broad.
  • Look to your past successes. What common threads do you find in all of them?
  • Identify 5 -7 categories, skills, problems you’ve been solving, or topics to focus your quest.
  • Take time to experiment. Mix and match a few ideas that have worked for you in the past.
  • Try out the possibilities to see what fits.
  • Talk to people who know you about the results.
  • Use each test to narrow your options.

As you keep trying on the options, you’ll begin to see what fits your values and your skills (or that of your team/business). Use the choosing to focus in on a clear vision of where you want to go or what you want to do. Brainstorming, ideation, conceiving new products and new initiatives all start with choosing from the wealth of possibilities available to you.

When It’s Time to Move Forward, Decide

Open options work great when we’re testing and trying, but when it comes time to be building and buying too many options paralyze. Moving forward requires commitment to one option, one direction or it will be too easy to get pulled aside.

Deciding allows us to determine a path. Decide literally means to kill off all other options. Deciding is what happens when we face the junction of many roads, knowing that whichever we take we’re moving on a path that means undoing to go back to that juncture again. We can commit to only one decision, but that commitment determines our direction, sets our destination, and fuels our ability to stay on course.

If you’re deciding, do this. Ask and answer 3 questions.

  1. Can you see the destination? Every time you succeeded you could see the finish when you started — the college degree, the thriving business, the trip across country. Define and describe where you are going or you will never get there.
  2. Is your head in it? Have you the skills, the DNA, and the ability to learn what you need to know to do this? The perfect opportunity is at the crossroads of your skills and the challenges that you enjoy most. Boredom comes when things are too easy. Anxiety sets in when things are too hard. Failure is certain when we choose challenges we weren’t built to meet. I’m 6 ft tall, so despite my grace and my 14 years of dance training, I’m never going to be a ballerina. But in my own way, I’ve become an information choreographer.
  3. Is your heart in it? Will you love the going there enough to keep it fun even when it’s not? Your heart has to be the keeper of the vision, the holder of the commitment that you make to yourself and the decision. We call that integrity. Can you trust your heart to be bigger than the fear that is sure to show up?

Knowing when to choose and when to decide is critical to sorting a clear path to your true north. Choose to sort out your best options then decide on which path will be your own.

Do you use choosing and deciding to your best advantage?

Knowing where you’re going is irresistibly attractive.
Who would follow you if you don’t?

Be irresistible.

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!

Have You Found a Way to Make Small Talk Work for You Yet?

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Could We Just Get On With It?

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The holidays come with their obligations. The running, the gathering, and the inevitable holiday parties. The parties with friends and families can be true memory makers, filled with traditions and great reunions. The parties with coworkers and strangers can be a little intimidating, filled with small talk and expectations.

Small talk used to make me crazy. It was painful to listen to the ritual, empty conversation that didn’t go anywhere. It felt so inauthentic — people saying things and pretending to care about them. I’d try to participate but it was energy draining. “Could we just get on with it?!!” Small talk seemed such a time waster. How could so many people spend so much time getting no where, talking about the weather?

Everyone talks about the weather, but no one does anything. — Mark Twain

I admit I didn’t understand. As a result, I not only wasn’t good at it, but I was disruptive.

I’d try to add humor, switch it up a little, and every attempt would fall flat. People who small talk like their small talk a certain way.

My aversion to small talk made networking events and big company meetings excruciating. An introvert with a mile wide shy streak, I could sense a small talk conversation 60 seconds before it started. I practiced defensive networking. I’d walk around, smile, and hope someone as uncomfortable as I was would discover me. My fear of babble was getting in my way. Worse, I was probably telegraphing something like disdain.

My inability to small talk wasn’t working for me. It was time for a new view: If so many people found it useful, maybe there was something to it. Maybe I should pay attention, do some observing.

What I found out is that small talk comes in more than one flavor. The second flavor might be what has left many of us with a bad taste.

Don’t Let the Small Talk You Hate Ruin the Small Talk that Makes Relationships

The first thing I noticed when I started observing is that small talk has a pattern and purpose. You’ve probably noticed it too. Small talk is used to fill silences. What I didn’t catch for quite a while is that small talk comes in two forms — one that serves people who already know each other and another for people building relationships.

The Small Talk that Builds Relationships

Small talk is a space filler and a social lubricant. People use conversation to move together over time. It’s a social bonding ritual in which people define relationships, set boundaries, find similarities and differences. Small talk enables people to learn another’s social position, validate similar interests, and establish a platform for a continuing conversation … “Oh yeah, Jesse is my movie buddy. Love talking movies with him.”

When relationships are new, small talk is how people learn each other’s boundaries.The opening remark and it’s response follow the rules of a conversational dance. It really works so easily and doesn’t have to be insincere or shallow if you know these rules.

  1. Small talk starts with an agreeable statement or question. Start a conversation by noticing something, such as “Beautiful day, isn’t it?” or “That’s a stunning necklace!” Smile and make it easy to talk to you. A simple agreeable statement or question is a way small talkers of making a positive initial connection. If you don’t feel comfortable talking about the weather, or the food, or the latest techie gadget, comment on something about the other person. Share something you’ve noticed that you’re enjoying at that every moment
  2. The response to the first question or statement usually builds on the first question or statement. Respond with a little more than was asked for … “Yes, I live for the tulips on Michigan Avenue.” or “Thank you! It attracts amazing people. Are you always so great at noticing nice things?”

    3. Accept the invitation the opening agreeable statement or question offers you. Continue the conversation by sharing something, passing the conversation back, and listening to your new acquaintance. Offer only as much detail as fits your new relationship.

Starting the conversation is actually the easier way. Notice something worth commenting on in an agreeable way.

If you’re at that holiday party with strangers and coworkers, remember this to have more success in starting a conversation. Don’t approach two people talking, they’re probably having a deeper conversation. Look for a group of people standing together. Then look at their feet. The way we stand gives away how engaged we are. The person most open to a new conversation will be the one whose feet are pointing away from the conversation.

A little practice at the agreeable opening statement or question made my experience of small talk so much more refreshing. Now I find it’s a great way to open doors to new relationships with amazing people. I highly recommend it.

If Small Talk Is So Good, Why Does Everyone Hate It?

Small talk shows up in other situations. One in particular may be what has earned small talk it’s bad name. That would be the small talk that happens before someone, particularly someone in authority, uses to find a common ground and an even relationship right before he or she delivers bad news. I call that “the three things before the but.” You may have experienced it. For the naive or new to the experience, it’s a kind of being blindsided. To those who have previously experienced it, it’s still painful because once burned it’s easy to recognize what’s next. An example might be …

You’re a fabulous writer, a charming person, and very charismatic, but … you’re fired.

The worst part of this version of ritual, warmup conversation is that it doesn’t matter how true the “three things before the but” may be, the way that they’re used to deliver the hard news renders the three compliments unbelievable. The three compliments were pulled together to manipulate the tone and smoothly move the conversation. This conversational tactic destroys trust.

Have You Found a Way to Make Small Talk Work for You Yet?

People who say the “three things before the but” aren’t building relationships.
People who smile and talk about the weather while shaking hands and stealing your wristwatch aren’t building relationships.
People who smile big, talk about the weather, ask about your kids, but forget your name over and over aren’t building relationships.

They all may be using the art of talk as a social lubricant, but their using it to serve themselves not a relationship.

It’s not the small talk that’s the problem or the opportunity. It’s the motive that drives it.

Choose wisely and you’ll find that small talk can open a world of new relationships. Break the ice, invite others in, and sincere small talk can build you a network of amazing people.

Though I never think of it as small talk when I do it. I think of it as fun conversation.

Have you thought about small talk lately? Have you found a way to make it work for you?

Be irresistible.
–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!

I’ve spent a couple of days on Twitter. Actually too many to count. My first tweet was March 16, 2007 and