Successful Blog

Jammies, Teary Eyes, and My Dad's Saloon: Is Your Best Behavior Authentic?

by

But I Want to Wear My Jammies!!

Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it. — Salavdor Dali

When I was small, it was rare that my mom would take me to my dad’s saloon. Usually we were there to return the family car so that he could drive home when he locked up in the wee hours of the morning. Naturally the folks at the bar knew her and knew me as my mom and dad’s daughter. While we waited for my dad to drive us home, we’d be saying “hellos” to friends of my parents.

Once when I was about 5 years old. I took a great challenge. I went to my bedroom and got ready for bed on my own. I had new pajamas. I couldn’t wait to wear them. They were pale green, thin cottony shirt and pants stamped with teddy bears all over them. I prized my favorite new jammies. They had buttons and a collar. They were like real clothes to sleep in.

Rather than being proud of my self-dressing accomplishment, my mom was thrown by it. She made a face. She said it was’t time yet. I was told I to change back into my clothes. We had to take the car to my dad at the tavern.

I suggested we show everyone my new pajamas. I pointed out that they looked like real clothes. She made it clear that my thought was out of the question. I got teary-eyed and pouty. My mom got adamant that I wouldn’t wear the pajamas and that I would find a way to a new attitude. She said some behavior was for just at home.

I was the daughter of the owner. His customers were also his friends. I grew up learning that my pajamas and teary-eyed mad attitudes didn’t belong in my dad’s tavern. I met those people with my best behavior.

Is that authentic?

Is Your Best Behavior Authentic?

One of the best things I ever heard a young mother say to her kids was, “Act as if you know how to behave.” Her children were polite, kind, and a pleasure to spend time with — both in public and at home. That’s what my mom believed too.

In this brief video, Melissa Pierce offers another way to look at it. The words posted under this video suggested that authenticity may be the wrong question.

I think I agree with her about the question.

Perhaps authenticity is rooted in intent and purpose.

Showing up as my best, cleaning my house, and doing the rest, help me . . .

  • show my respect for you and for myself.
  • raise my game and my investment
  • communicate with sensitivity and grace

For me, that’s authentic. Wearing my denim shirt with teddy bears all over it is also a statement of authenticity.

How do you see it? Are you authentic when you’re on your best behavior?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

REACHING OUT – EDUCATION & COMMUNITY

by

Are you sharing what you’ve learned ? All forms of educational institutions attempt to create community. From grade school through to post secondary education, communities are created through classrooms, activities and sports. Many educational institutions have websites where school information and directories are located. I found two examples of social media being used to foster community and take it one step further. The interesting thing about this is that both individuals are documenting and sharing the process of using social media to strengthen community. 

Rachel Reuben is the Director of Web Communication and Strategic Projects at State University of New York at New Paltz. Rachel launched an online community for students based upon a cafe like context. She created a Ning group and invited potential students to join. Although not a new endeavor, other universities have done the same thing, Rachel is  documenting and sharing the process with her community so more can learn from the experience.

Diane Collier, a PHD student at UBC started a community to encourage dialogue about the readings in advance of discussion in class. Instead of emailing everyone it was a simpler forum. The students could also respond quickly, easily and in simple terms. “The idea was partly to take away the voice of the prof too so that students engage in freer way.We also encouraged students to add personal and professional stuff. videos, pics…Also, it’s ongoing. We didn’t shut it down after the course so students could continue to talk as they move into teaching.” When she gives lectures to future teachers about methods she uses this example to demonstrate the power of community through social media. 

Sharing valuable information about using social media to foster community growth and increase ROI is what sets these two examples apart.

 

Kathryn @northernchick

Photo credit:FJ Gaylor

What Is Social Networking?

by

The LANGUAGE of SOCIAL MEDIA

Words have a deep effect on
how we interpret and interact with the world.
The words we use and how we define them
reveal our interests, concerns, and values.
This series explores the words of social media.

social networking and a social network

Most literally, social networking would be meeting and making connections and relationships — both business and social — online and offline. In the lexicon of social media, social networking involves establishing an online presence and connecting regularly with other people and businesses who have done the same. Connections are made through hyperlinks and references embedded in personal profiles, comment text, audio comments, podcasts, videos.

Social networking sites provide efficient ways for individuals (and individual businesses) to find and connect with friends and colleagues, to establish new relationships and deepen them, and to introduce friends and colleagues to each other. Many social networking sites also offer platforms for discussion of topics that a community or network finds mutually interesting or beneficial.

In the most concise terms, a social network is a group of like-minded individuals connected by a common interest.

@rubybluesox: “we know ‘enough’ about each other that we could ‘hang out’ in person and be friends … but in a ‘linguistic’ way… so it requires a certain depth that most ‘marketers’ aren’t used to”
@thomasclifford: “What is social networking? A means to validate our search for meaning.”
@brendansmith: @pixelfan for me everything i do in social networking is business, for fun, family and friends, I use the phone or meet face to face
@pm_41: @mashable Why would I hire people to tweet for me? The whole idea of social-networking is to express YOURSELF in front of the world.
@brunsvold: I sometimes get the feeling that social networking is like high school. The only way to survive is to pretend to be too cooler than everyone

For more information see:
Social Network
Social Networking in Plain English
Social-networking sites work to turn users into profits
I Saw The Future Of Social Networking The Other Day
Leadership, the Internet and the ‘Tribes’ of the World

SEE ALSO:
What Is Social Media?

Got more to add? C’mon let’s talk.

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

How to Leave an Unforgettable First Impression … of the Very Best Kind

by


Irresistible Beats Embarrassed Every Time

First impressions. Guess we’ve all made our share of bad ones. In my experience, bad first impressions tend to happen when I try too hard, when I focus on myself and what I want from a certain situation. Whether the occasion is personal or business, if I become about attracting attention, I end up looking like someone who wears sequins and top hat to blue jeans bar … It’s an unforgettable first impression, but not the one I wanted to leave behind.

It happens. People do it. So do big corporations. We’re even inventing new ways to do the equivalent as the noise level rises on the social web.

In a hard economy, first impressions become even more important. People have less time, fewer opportunities, and more competition. A bad first impression may not lead to a chance for a second meeting.

Unfortunately trying too hard usually too often leads to the wrong kind of attention.

Do you, does your business, leave an unforgettable first impression … of the very best kind?

How to Leave an Unforgettable First Impression

In a one-to-one market, every individual and every business is meeting customers as individuals. As the social web grows, people discuss experiences and pass their impressions far further than was ever possible. Suddenly a bad day can become an incident or a nice passing gesture can be raised to heroic. Every first impression has the possibility of being amplified.

We all want to make the positive, unforgettable first impression. That’s the one that wins us friends and business.

What makes someone unforgettable? What makes us want to go out of our way to see someone we hardly know? How do some people leave an indelible first impression so attractive that we look forward to being with them again?

What do those magnetic people and companies consistently offer?

  • a curious, open, intelligent mind
    Some people spark our imagination. They energize and motivate us. When we share a conversation, they literally make our brains light up with thoughts and ideas. Their kind of thinking inspires confidence and respect — in them and in us. People who are mindful and curious find solutions where other folks find problems. They don’t let small differences or ambiguities throw them. They help us find the action inside our ideas. They listen well and respond. We feel that they truly see us.
  • a positive, open, knowing heart
    Some people love living. They don’t really have an easier life; they just look at life and business differently. Small things don’t get to be worries, so they spend time on little disagreements. When others might be a little more distant, they pull us near with positivity. They smile soon as they see us, long before we say say hello. It’s easy to say hello when we feel like we already know them.
  • a clear, open, meaningful purpose
    Some people see the world and everyone in it with the eyes and the mind of a discoverer. When we say things, they listen for what our words mean to us. They know themselves in a real way, which makes them easy to understand and easy to be with. They offer everyone solid ground to stand on, which makes us all feel a little taller when we’re around them.

People like that are unforgettable. When we see them again, we go back to where they’re standing, even if we hardly know them. We want that unforgettable experience again. If we are able, we introduce that unforgettable person to our friends.

It works the same for companies. When companies meet customers in that unforgettable way, customers want to have that experience again. We often tell our friends about how we were treated and bring them back with us so they get the same positive experience.

You might notice that each point closes on the feeling we’re left with. Isn’t that what a first impression is? A feeling about someone or something that we’re getting to know?

People remember most how we make them feel. The most unforgettable people … of the best kind … focus their attention and care on the people around them. They know that an unforgettable positive first impression is the doorway to true communication.

What’s your recipe for a unforgettable first impression of the very best kind? What tools do you use to make that impression a reality?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

Do Your Customers Look a Lot Like You? Could that Be a Good Thing?

by

People Who Think Like We Do

Starting an online business doesn’t seem that complicated. People do it every day. Some even start by doing what we love — building a product or service that captures their imagination and best skills — because doing what we love makes good business sense. Then they figure out who’s like to buy it.

That’s often where folks make their mistake. They don’t know who their ideal client or customer is. As a product developer, I leanred that building products and services takes a lot of knowing how customers think.

If you don’t already have a customer base that you know intimately and well, or you’re new at making product, it’s likely that the first customers you attract will be folks who look a lot like you. Why is that?

Ever notice a pattern in the people you think of as engaging, entertaining, or just plain smart? Ever notice a corollary pattern in the people you think as … not?

Consider this:
We think people who think like us are smart and people who don’t are being difficult or unable to keep up.

Of course, we allow for migitating circumstances. She’s only 5 years old. He’s having a bad day. He’s not good at math. It’s semantics that threw us off. But if it happens again and again, that person who doesn’t process thoughts the same as we do, must be disagreeable or not too swift — no pleasure to spend time with. Who can blame anyone for that? It seems guaranteed that he or she isn’t having a great time with us.

Sometimes if we listen closely as we talk, we find that the “difficult, not so smart” folks think more like we do than we first suspected. Sometimes we even form a relationship.

Is it a good thing that our customers look like us? What should we do about that?

How Do You Use that to Grow?

So the customers we attract first will be the customers who think like us. It’s only natural they’ll think what we do is smart. They’ll see the brilliance of our products or services. They’ll work with us to fix our problems and will see enough of themselves to forgive our occasional misteps.

That’s why our first customers look so much like us.
That’s why they love what we do.
And I agree with Steve Farber that’s the best foundation on which to build a business …

Do what you love in service to those who love what you do. —Steve Farber

But suppose you’re a rare and divergent thinker … not that we know anyone like that … how can you find a group of customers large enough to sustain a business like that?

As soon as your customers get to know how you think, make it your driving goal to know everything about each one of them. That’s the beauty of the social web. It lets us do that so much easier than we could in the past. But don’t leave out on the gound networking events.

  • Meet them and talk to them one at a time whenever, wherever you can.
  • Ask them about them, not about what you’re doing.
  • Test and try their ideas, ones resonate with them — especially those that make you a little nervous.
  • Give them a stake, a voice, a place in the business.
  • Showcase your regulars so that other folks can identify with them.
  • Be curious, learn from, and fall in love with the differences in the like minds around you.

What will happen next is that, your thinking will grow and change, and together you and they will attract people who look like you and them. Then show everyone how to do the same thing again. Open ideas, open minds, and open doors are how people find their way in.

Of course none of us are the same. But especially on the social web, we know what it means to say that like minds attract. It’s a fact that can dilute a business or be a strategy.

Have you got customers, readers, clients who look like you? Can you make them a bigger part of your business?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!
Buy the ebook and find out the secret.

A Symphony and SOBCon: Are You Part of Something Bigger than Yourself?

by

A Symphony in My Head


There’s a song in my head.
I heard it first quiet in the night at my computer.
Then it came again when I woke.

It never really left me.

It began … looping in and out of days … over two years ago.

I considered it an insignificant melody,
a memory tracing, some forgotten top-40 wonder.

Until I asked … until I tried … until I found …
no one, not anyone, could
recognize it, identify it … hum along,
then I knew.

It was mine.

Not a song, but a score.

When I claimed it, it grew
louder, broader, deeper.
It transformed into a symphony, with horns, woodwinds and strings.
I hear the most delicate and the most booming percussion
with a triangle and an ever-changing, but not-so-different drum.

Yet a symphony in a person’s head is hardly an idea.
It’s colors and rhythms that move hands and words.
(maybe feet when it’s certain no one’s looking.)

It’s still a thought.

To be a symphony it needs
a composer to score it
an orchestra to express it
an audience to participate and receive it …
and a conductor who understands
the music, the instruments, the players, the audience,
and the meaning of intentional serendipity.

A symphony takes breathing and doing
and more than one human being.

A symphony is expertise, artistry, community, and trust made real.

NOTE: When the symphony is playing, I might add room for a little thinking
about possible choreography for occasions when no one’s looking …
or even those when they are.

It’s true I have a symphony in my head. It started as we planned SOBCon07.
And it’s still playing louder, longer, stronger as we plan SOBCon again.

It has me thinking about the phrase “conducting business.” Somewhere inside that phrase is the idea of turning leadership from one to many. A conductor leaves space for the expertise and decisions of the players who know their instruments. Likewise in business, a leader steps back to let many people and their relationships — clients, developers, buyers, sellers, teachers, learners — come together in the best ways. Leaders produce something bigger any one person.

Maybe that’s why that symphony started playing right before SOBCon.

To build the conference, we knew we had to give ourselves over to the people who would be there. We had to step back and leave room for the many relationships — speakers, attendees, sponsors, signers, site managers, bartenders — that come together in the best ways to produce something bigger any one person. We designed it so that attendees would have as much time to talk each other about the ideas — as they did listening to the speakers. We trusted that every person in the room would bring expertise.

People who knew the value of working together were the ones who came to sit at our tables.

The first year we became “an awesome event.” The second year, we began teaming up together. We talked about and tackled real problems. We’re partners, teammates, and coauthors. We’ve entered joint ventures. After we left, we still call each other for support and advice. We still meet, talk, and Twitter. This year we’re coming back with more to offer to each other and every person who joins us. We only have one rule: Be Nice. But we also like it if you’re serious and you come with trust.

And I personally plan to bring more than anyone else in there — including my dearest friends, Mr. Starbucker, Ms. VanFossen, Ms. Piersall , Mr. Clark , Mr. Smith, Mr. Solis, Mr. Bullock, or even my poptart partner Mr. Brogan.

I’m also bringing a special guest … who said he’d help me.
Don’t worry, it’s a fabulously GOOD secret.

Because a symphony is a challenge to bring all that we are. And I plan to be playing with every bit of my head, heart, and purpose.

Every great event, every true community, every well-run business is a symphony, isn’t it?

Ever been to the symphony? Every played in an orchestra? Ever done anything like that? Are you part of something bigger than yourself?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!