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Living Life: The Problem Isn’t Not Knowing What You Want to Do …

January 30, 2012 by Liz 12 Comments

(Updated in 2020)

Photo by MI PHAM on Unsplash

Do You Have It Backwards?

Every day we wake up to the time of our lives.

When life is going well, it’s easy to take the day with a flying start. But that second that the ground starts to freeze over. The bed starts to seem warmer and our feet can get a little cold. That’s when we need to be invested. We need a meaningful reason to get up and make progress.

It takes a strategy to live a life that isn’t just passing time.

  • Don’t try to rule the climate, but use the opportunities it holds. Enjoy when the sun is warm. Fill your sails when the wind is going your way.
  • Study the terrain to choose the most efficient, least dangerous roads. Highways weren’t made for bikes. Cars don’t belong on train tracks.
  • Enlist help and advice from those who have gone before us. Ask the people who’ve been where you’re going.
  • Employ systems that keep things going without reinventing what works. Maintain what supports you.
  • Have a mission to reach a vision on the horizon. Decide where you’re going before you go.

The last one is critical to a life strategy.

We live as if at the end of our life, we’ll know …

    • who we are.
    • what we’ll do.
    where we will end up.

Somehow we have it backwards. We’re supposed to decide those things first. Then we can start down our path.

What’s Most Critical to Living Life?

Strategy is a realistic plan to advance by leveraging opportunity over time. In order to advance you have to know who you are where you’re advancing to.
Like any business, a life with a strategy has a better chance to succeed.

What Other People Don’t Know

If you ask opinions about what you should do, other people will have plenty of them. Don’t wait for other people to tell you. They don’t have to live your life. They won’t lose if you waste time chasing down a future that isn’t yours, and they won’t mind if you give up your life living it for them. Even the most well-meaning people run the risk of giving you advice better suited to them than to you.

Who knows more about you than you? Who ever will? You know what you think, dream, desire, and need. You know what you fear. You know what it would take to move you from here to there. Listen to that inner guidance system that tells you when you’re doing well, you’re learning, you’re doing something well. The one person who has a vested interest in how your life turns out is you.

Vision and mission are critical to living life. They are identity, intention, and direction. Without them, how will you wisely invest your time? It’s a shame to waste a whole life.

How do you know? How do you decide?

Rarely is the problem not knowing where we want to be. It’s admitting that we’ll have to make a commitment to get there.

Decide and Commit

Decide. It matters less what you decide than that YOU decide and that you make a commitment to that decision. Listen to the truth you know about yourself, decide what the purpose of your life will be, and know why that’s meaningful to you. Pick a vision the future that would be the best use of what’s been given you — your talents, your skills, your personality. What should you be doing more of to use them well? What life that would use your skills, the problems you can solve, and the value you have always brought to the world? Decide on a future – a vision — and make it your quest — your mission — to get there. In other words, choose to be your best self and make a commitment to that.

You can always decide to adjust your decision.

Vision is who we’ll be and where we want to go. Vision is the context that gives each life decision intention, direction, and identity. Mission is the compelling reason that will get us there. Mission makes every minute and every decision worth getting up and investing in. Vision and mission turn living into a meaningful cause worth a life’s campaign.

If you don’t know where you’re going, you’ll end up somewhere you never intended to be.
If you don’t know why you’re going, you’ll give up when the smallest obstacle appears.
Set your intention on a vision that describes your best identity — down to your DNA.
Put your head, heart, and feet into your mission. Make it a quest. Nothing will stop you.

Photo by Immo Wegmann on Unsplash

Every day, every hour, every minute will keep passing whether you know where you’re going or not. Wouldn’t you rather own the hourglass than sit on the sand as it drops through? You have to live your life. Shouldn’t you be the one who decides what it will be about?

Have you got a strategy to live a life a that isn’t just passing time?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!

I was researching in my archives when I came across this post. I thought I’d update it. But it was hours later and I’d almost rewritten it totally. So on that note. I offer you this new, old post — published once, in another form, January 30, 2010.

Filed Under: Business Life, Marketing /Sales / Social Media, Successful Blog Tagged With: life., LinkedIn, living life, Strategy/Analysis

7 Ways to an Attractive, Authentic Relationship … With Yourself

May 16, 2011 by Liz Leave a Comment

cooltext443809437_relationships

About this time each year, new folks discover the energy, the community, and the benefits of being online.
About this time each year, folks who’ve been here often get back that “new blogger feeling.”
And some folks even start looking back at where they’ve been to figure out where they might be going.

I do all of that.

And today finds me thinking of what makes successful and lasting online relationships.
The longer I look it, the more I realize it relies on how well we relate to ourselves.

So rather than talk about how to be visible to people you want to meet, how to attract people who care about what you’re doing, why not take a minute spending time on what it takes for you to get to know you?

Top 7 Ways to an Authentic Relationship … With Yourself

If you read down this list, it’s fairly obvious that the same seven apply to relationships with other people as do to the relationship you might want to build with you. The advantage of taking the time to reflect on these seven and yourself is that knowing who you bring to those other relationships is foundational to forging something valuable and lasting at every turn.

Do you treat yourself as well as you expect yourself to treat other people?
Do you give yourself the respect that you deserve?
Do you keep your promises to yourself and value your input?
All of these will build a better relationship with yourself and with other people.

  1. Show up whole and human. Do you see yourself as a person or a worker? Do you hold yourself up to some superhuman standards? Isn’t it unfair (and maybe a little snobby) to set one standard for yourself and another for everyone around you? Show up for everyone. Give yourself the time — and the you — you would give your best friend.
  2. Talk in your authentic voice. A good part of authenticity is knowing when we’re hiding behind our history. Another good part is seeing and admitting when we’re feeling one thing and saying that we feel something quite different. Choose the authentic kind words that express who you are now and what you are feeling. Know when to share them and when to keep them near you. But trust your “self” and your voice to know the authentic life you’re living.
  3. Tell your own truth.We all grew up with “tape recordings in our heads” that contradict what we know is true about ourselves. Why do we talk as if those are the reality? Stop long enough to gather the skills you’ve built. Reflect for the time it takes to appreciate why you might want to be friends with you. Learn what it is you are uniquely good at doing and don’t be afraid to tell the truth about who you are. The world didn’t hold a meeting to decide only one kind of person can be here.
  4. Have room for folks to tell theirs too. Hear the truth when it hides inside what other folks are saying. Ask until you know, believe, and feel that you’re communicating. Make it easy for them to share what might be weighing on their heads and their hearts with you. What you’ll find by listening to their truth with all of your being is that knowing the their truth deeply enough to understand it won’t hurt you. It opens us up to accept our own humanity.
  5. Don’t try to tie ideas up in a bow. Life doesn’t come in boxes that organize well with single labels. It’s rare that one occasion will summon up only one word or emotion. Enjoy the depth and live the kaliedoscope changes. Each breath of color and dimension adds new meaning that will get shut off and cut off if you try to categorize or define every minute. We aren’t meant to define our lives so completely. We’re meant to live them.
  6. Half the show is in the comments. Now and then take a moment to stop, reflect, and collect your own opinion on who you are without outside influence. Sit with yourself in your personal invisible comment box and have a conversation about who you are and where you’re going. If you don’t like the goals and the destinations, change them. If you don’t like the design of your life, get a new one.
  7. Be helpful, not hypeful. . . . Make everything about them not you. Default to what generates energy. Help yourself by helping other people. It’s not natural for a human to be a hermit. When the dark weather settles around you, reach out to help someone who is facing a far worse climate. Don’t think about how people treat you – those who get it wrong, don’t “get” it. Be your own model of how it should work and enjoy being it.

And when you make that relationship with yourself, you’ll find you’re the kind that attracts other people. They’ll see that you value what you bring and that what you offer is real.

So go ahead, what could be wrong with being someone you like, respect, and want to be with?

Be irresistible.

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!

See also:
Top 10 Ways to Start Living Your Life

Buy the Insider’s Guide to Online Conversation.

Filed Under: Marketing /Sales / Social Media, Motivation, Successful Blog Tagged With: authenticity, bc, life., LinkedIn, relationships

Do You Know the Six Stages of a Dysfunctional Project?

May 29, 2009 by Liz Leave a Comment

relationships button

Sometimes it’s nice to do work things on the weekend–to use the free time you have to get a jump on the next week.

Some projects raise the bar to meet our ability to put in extra time. Don’t give up your life to make your work go faster. You could find yourself living less and less and working more and more instead. And in the end, you might end up a wreck rather than feeling like you’ve done something worth accomplishing.

Project problems can seem like one-of-a-kind things — certainly they’re only related to this awful project, this difficult client, this inexperienced team member. But if every project has it’s problems, then something dysfunctional is happening.

The Six Stages of a Dysfunctional Project
1. Enthusiasm
2. Disillusionment
3. Panic
4. Search for the Guilty
5. Punishment to the Innocent
6. Praise and Glory to the Non-Participants.

How do you spot a dysfunctional project on the horizon?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

Buy the ebook. Learn the art of online conversation.

Filed Under: Inside-Out Thinking, Motivation, Successful Blog Tagged With: bc, life., Productivity, project management

Birdsongs, Business, and Life

March 30, 2008 by Liz Leave a Comment

I've been thinking . . .

the songs that birds sing.

This morning, very early, I went out into a foggy day to see the sky and feel my feet on the ground. I heard a birdsong. It was a strong and familiar sound that I’ve not heard since who knows when. Immeidately, I was transported to days when I was a child and other ways of thinking.

That bird was doing what that bird does, and doing it well.

I’m glad I heard that particular bird today.

I’ll be thinking about that birdsong all day. What makes the birdsong of a business or a life?

Liz's Signature

Filed Under: Motivation, Successful Blog Tagged With: bc, birdsong, Ive-been-thinking, life.

Universal Thoughts

October 5, 2007 by Liz 27 Comments

I've been thinking . . .

about the power of thoughts.

They say that what I think is the deciding factor in what the universe serves up to me. I can see the sense of that.

As I think, I see.

When I choose to focus on the brighter, smarter ideas and people, I seem to find them more.

When I’m sure of my direction, folks follow me. When I’m feeling insecure, folks challenge my ideas. It’s hardly quantum physics to calculate that why should be.

As I think, I feel.

When I’m certain that what I’ll be doing is going to turn out right, it always seems to . . . maybe that’s because I make it so. When I know I’m on the right track, it’s as if I touch a cloud to make the right things rain down

As I think, I am.

This weekend the universe is supporting every good dream.

I’m going to think it so.

What about you?

Liz's Signature

Filed Under: Motivation, Successful Blog Tagged With: bc, Ive-been-thinking, law-of-attraction, life., thinking

Imagine a Blue Sky, Blissful Weekend

August 31, 2007 by Liz 15 Comments

Oh my wow! It’s Friday, again! Already!

What did I do this week? What didn’t I get done? What miracles did I make? What wishes didn’t come? What went right? What went wrong? Who were those cranky people I had to calm down? Who were the ones who gave me such support?

Will I spend my weekend reliving my week over and over?

Is that what time is for. Is that what life is about?

No, no. Not my life.

When I’m in that last five minutes of my life and when I’m in the five minutes that come after, I want to be thinking of the time I spent being alive.

I want my life to be about living.

I can imagine a wonderful weekend. I can hang the moon in the daylight sky. I can fill the night with colorful lights and people who have great ideas. I can imagine being with friends who understand that living isn’t always easy, but it’s always about thinking and caring, and remembering to breathe.

I can imagine a blue sky, blissful weekend.

Then I can make it happen.

Filed Under: Motivation, Successful Blog Tagged With: bc, imagination, Ive-been-thinking, life.

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