Successful Blog

How Can You Get Your Online Social Skills Working Offline Too?

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One Room, One Community of the Most Incredible Ones

Every year when I plan the content for SOBCon, I realize it’s an amazing proposition for every person — speaker, attendee, sponsor who walks into that room. It’s one room, one most welcoming community but intimidating too because it’s made of up of the most incredible ones.

It’s like walking into a living Internet. Shiny minds everywhere …

How can anyone be visible in a room like that? Yet we were. I’ve thinking about what made the conversation work for even the newest members of that highly charged group. What I was that the skills we learn on the interwebs can serve us in the most power-charged rooms of real people.

We just have to translate back to real people what we already know. Here’s a few I saw in action that helped folks connect last week.

  • Focus is attractive. We like people who know what they’re about. Rick Wion’s unabashed passion for his client, Klondike bars, drew a conversation around him. Gail Goodwin’s vision for the Global Hug Tour got a whole room ready to wrap their arms around the world. Go buy a hug now.
  • Change the plan when it’s not working. Greg Ross, from Colgate said best when he said, “The suspense we’ve built is far more the video will deliver. Let’s move on.” How cool was that?!!
  • Disruption can be fun, when it’s respectful. Elevator pitches in a real elevator got us to forget our self-consciousness and laugh. Thanks @DaveMurr and @RamseyM
  • One question can start a conversation. Amy LeForge said so much in her story of changing what she feared. What she heard was that so many others felt as she had when she stood back last year.
  • Community is about learning, not teaching. Walmart, Colgate, Allstate, WeSeed, Metzger, BuzzCorps, AirCell, TheImageStudios, One2OneNetwork, BlogCatalog — all sponsors — came to learn from the community and left with a roomful of friends and a passel of ideas.

That handful of skills made ones — individuals — stand out in an outstanding room of people.

How can you get your online social skills working offline too?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

Buy the ebook. Learn the art of online conversation.

Ever Been in a Community on the Same Frequency?

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My SOBCon09 ROI

relationships button

Long before there was a SOBCon, I fell in love with a character in a book Radical Edge by Steve Farber.The character was so humanly written, the first question I asked Steve when I met him was whether Agnes is a real person. He said, “No,” and looked off at a vision. To this day, I’m thinking he got off on a technicality. Not important. What matters is her message. Here’s a dialogue between the character Agnes and Steve (also a character in the story.)

“I don’t know how much of that I could have accomplished if I hadn’t found my frequency.”

Steve questioned the idea, “Human beings are more complicated than than that.”

He got this answer.

“Yes they are, But it’s not about finding your frequency by ruling out everything else; on the contrary, it’s about finding the frequency that includes all those other important values and ideals. The very act of trying to wrap it all up is what’s really important, because in order to do so, you have . . . define them, think them through, understand them to their core, and evaluate your life against each one.”

A bit of challenge to say the least. Every year SOBCon brings that conversation back to me.

A Community on the Same Frequency?

Putting on an event that is not the usual has its downside. How do you explain to sponsors, speakers, attendees what they’ve never experienced? Ever tried to explain Cirq du Soleil to someone who doesn’t know it? I have such respect for the street team who first launched it.

Words alone aren’t adequate. Images are ambiguous. Even the passionate vision of an evangelist drawing details and answering questions is only a promise of a future reality. I can talk about what happens. I can talk about the value propositions and the offers. But until people experience it, I have to believe that a big part of their investment is trust.

In business you can contract schedule and budget. You can write specs and standards, but you can’t define human experience. The quality of experience is a function of how people invest their time, energy, and trust. I saw trust in every step of SOBCon

  • Trust with the planning. I trust myself. I trust my integrity. I trust my advisors who get relentless phone calls about the content ideas that change, evolve, grow, mutate like living organisms. I trust their honesty, patience, and good will for the conference.
  • Trust in my partner. Trust in Terry means I never think about whether he’s there to support me, whether I’ll need to defend my ideas. I trust that he’ll tell me when I’m off my rocker. I trust that he’ll be there in the dark of night when everyone else is sleeping.

  • Trust in the folks who offer the time to the project. It’s more than delegation when your house payment counts on it. It’s more than getting help when your name is on the letterhead. Trust is a big word when it’s possible that people could be making more work not less. It’s even bigger when some volunteers disappear or soon show they want the benefits of participating without much investment.

  • The mutual trust with the sponsors, speakers, and attendees. We all trusted that we all would deliver.

  • Trust that serious work can be fun. Being in a room where we can finally ask unabashed questions and get solid answers … or create new solutions is invigorativing and reminds us that we can do things we forgot we knew how. Our minds release different chemicals when we play with ideas.

  • Trust in ourselves. Letting go, asking unabashed questions to get solid answers … and creating new solutions … is invigorativing. How cool is it to be reminded that we can do things we forgot we knew how.

SOBCon runs on trust and produces actionable ideas.

It was 130 people all set on learning this new world of ours, all set on helping each other out. That kind of energy is electric, spontaenous, and self-generating. In a high trust environment, we talk and think faster and laugh more. The ideas come at the speed of the Internet with humanity and just don’t stop.

Trust doesn’t rule out everything else. It wraps up the other values … competence, integrity, generosity, comaradeship, and so many others. But trust is the fuel and the frequency of SOBCon.

Ever been part of a community on the same frequency?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

How Can You Change What You're Afraid of?

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Each Year We Get Better

The theme of SOBCon09 was the ROI of Relationships. We underscored the importance of relationships in business and had a chance to make and celebrate a few while we’re doing that.

Every year, we get a better at smoothing the edges of what we’re inventing — our businesses, our community, and this event that we build together when we walk into that room.

At SOBCon08, a beautiful young woman joined us. She signed up with only her first name. She was in the room the whole time, but I didn’t get to know her well. This year she returned with her full name and seemed so much more involved. As I read her story, I wish I had reached out to her more last year. She’s inspired me to make sure that I look to do that more.

Reflections on the ROI of SOBCon09 by Amy LeForge

I’m just home from a weekend in Chicago for SOBCon09. The theme this year was The Return On Investment (ROI) of Relationships and I’ve been reflecting on what my personal ROI is for this trip. This was actually my second time attending SOBCon. That fact came as a surprise to more than one of the attendees this year when I introduced myself. The reason they were surprised is because they didn’t remember me from last year. That’s right. I went to a marketing/business/entrepreneurial/blogging conference last year and hid. I sat back in the shadows and listened and learned. I made a few friends, but I shied away from actually stepping out and having conversations or building relationships.

Don’t get me wrong: I have no one to blame for this but me. No one at SOBCon was (or is) anything less than stellar and wonderful and amazing. Every last one of them. I was out of my comfort zone the entire time; it was clear that I was in the company of people who knew and understood so much more than I and I was intimidated. I do not exaggerate when I tell you I sobbed for a good deal of the drive home last year.

I have long wondered what caused my attack of shyness. My husband, upon hearing me describe what had happened at SOBCon08, was quite puzzled. “You’re not shy,” he said. And he’s right. I’m not. Perhaps it’s that I’m an introvert, but even that label does not completely fit. It’s true that I am a listener, but I also love to tell stories. I wouldn’t be a blogger if I didn’t.

I came to SOBCon09 bound and determined to do better. This meant stepping far out of my comfort zone and forcing myself to join conversations, ask questions, and get to know people. Most frightening were the evening social gatherings. I went anyways. (I won’t lie to you: I had to have several rather stern talks with myself about not giving up and running away.)

If you talk to SOBCON attendees from years past you’ll hear how people walk in as strangers and leave as family. Friendships are forged that extend far beyond the boundaries of this one weekend. It’s all true.

I cannot begin to adequately describe how kind and welcoming people were, or how blessed I am to have been able to friend so many. Even when I very honestly said, “I’m scared out of my wits here,” I was warmly received and supported.

It was a conversation with Chris Cree that really crystallized things for me. When you feel so completely out of your league, as though you’re surrounded by people who are just so far ahead of you it’s emotionally exhausting. You finish every day just raw inside. Chris told me he knew what that felt like; that he had experienced it himself and that fear was playing a big role. That’s when I realized: sometimes we need to change what we fear.

I was reminded of a field trip I arranged for my behaviorally disordered students to a ropes course several years ago. If you’ve never seen a ropes course, it’s basically an obstacle course about 20 feet off the ground. I got it into my head that my class would benefit from doing the course.

Have I mentioned that I’m afraid of heights?

There were safety harnesses of course, but that didn’t stop me from almost passing out at one particular obstacle. Two trees were a few feet apart, each with a small platform. All I had to do was step from one platform across open space to the other. It couldn’t have been more than an 18-inch gap. With all the kids watching I didn’t dare to quit so I took the step. In order to succeed, I had to change what I was afraid of.

This weekend, I was blessed with the wisdom, expertise, time, and friendship of more people than I have space to acknowledge here. I cannot begin to put a value on the support I received or the help I was given. I deserve none of it. I am no more special than anyone else and yet I walk away having been given priceless gifts. I doubt I could ever thank people enough.

So what was my ROI on SOBCon09? Huge. Priceless. Beyond description.

Worth it.

And guys? No longer will I allow fear to stop me from walking into a room to make new friends. No longer will I allow myself to run and hide when I really need to stand and shine. Instead, I will fear letting you down by not using what you’ve taught me. I fear disappointing you after having been given so much.

I have changed what I am afraid of.

Amy LeForge writes about the successes, failures, and funny stories of being a parent at Earnest Parenting. You’ll find her on Twitter as @EarnestOne

I’ve been afraid like Amy has been. Sometimes, in some rooms, I find I still am.
I was afraid when I read this blog post that she, you, and me would only see that I let her down last year. It’s hard to think someone has courageous as she is would have feel so sad on her way home.

But so much would be lost if I didn’t share her story.
I had to change what I’m afraid of. I don’t want it to happen again.

A new outcome is inside a new point of view.

How can you change what you’re afraid of?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

WILF Comes to SOBCon

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Today we have a guest post from Robert Hruzek, a SOBCon alumnus that I had the pleasure of meeting last year. I am looking forward to spending more time talking to him this year!

What I Learned From...
What I Learned From...

Howdy fellow SOBCon folks!

Hey, if you’re scratchin’ your head and wonderin’ what the heck WILF means – and what it has to do with SOBCon – well Bubba, wonder no more!

It stands for “What I Learned From…” and is a groupwrite project we run on the first Monday of every month over at Middle Zone Musings. Yup; every month!

In fact, since we started back in May of ’07, there have been 23 editions of WILF with a total of 650 entries to date! Pretty amazing, when you get right down to it.

As the name implies, the purpose of the WILF groupwrite project is to encourage folks to share something – anything – they learned from… well, whatever the topic that month happens to be. And, in doing so, they collect a link (and sometimes two) back to their blog. It’s that simple.

So what does that have to do with SOBCon? Well, for the month of May, the topic is (sound of drumroll) COMMUNITY – which happens to tie right in, don’cha think? So for the next project I’m extending a special invitation for all my fellow SOBCon’ers. (Is that a word? Who cares?) And, it’s not limited to those who will, y’know, actually be there. Nope; it’s a lot bigger than that!

In fact, this topic is for anyone who:

  • A) plans to be at SOBCon09,
  • B) has attended any previous SOBCon,
  • C) hasn’t made it yet but wishes they could one day,
  • D) never heard of SOBCon and accidentally stumbled across this post, or
  • E) has a cat who walked across the keyboard when you had the SOBCon website up on the screen. Or whatever.

(I think that about covers everyone, don’t you?)

So, no matter which letter of the alphabet you happen to, uh, B (sorry), you’re invited to join the fray and tell us what you learned!

Here’s how it works.

Write an article sharing something you learned, either from SOBCon, or because of it, or would like to have learned from it, or – hey, you get the idea, right? Length isn’t important –you can be as eloquent (or as brief) as you like. (Note: there’s only two rules: Be nice – and keep it “G-rated”)

Then, you post it on your blog sometime that week and email me the link at rhruzek [at] sbcglobal [dot] net. I’ll collect ‘em all, then post the entire list of entries at the Middle Zone. The list will then point everyone to YOUR brilliant blog! Plus, you’ll have a great compendium of lessons learned, to boot! I’m tellin’ ya; ya can’t beat that with a stick! (Well, I guess you could… but that would be, y’know, wrong!)

OK; mark your blogging calendars, folks, ‘cause the kickoff for this special WILF will be on Monday, May 7 (right after SOBCon weekend), and will be open for entries through Sunday, May 13. (But don’t worry if you’re late – I can always add your link to the list later.)

Hey, I look forward to seein’ y’all in Chicago. Tap me on the shoulder and introduce yourself, won’t you? Just look for the hat.
_______________________________

Robert Hruzek
Robert Hruzek

Robert Hruzek currently lives in Houston, Texas, and thoroughly enjoys being married to The Most Wonderful Wife in the Whole World (sorry fellas, it’s no contest). He is usually employed as an engineering project manager, a job which has allowed him to travel, live and work in many interesting locations within the United States and around the world.

Robert writes on the Web at Middle Zone Musings. It’s described as a comfortable place to stop, have a cup of coffee, swap a few stories and share practical ideas for the real world. He doesn’t ask for much, just a bit of your brain every now and then. Why not drop by, grab a seat, take a load off, and relax…

Are You Big Enough to Help Someone Become Greater Than Yourself

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The theme of SOBCon09 is the ROI of Relationships. To underscore the importance of relationships in business and to have a chance to make and celebrate a few while we’re doing that, I’ve opened up this series by successful and outstanding bloggers like you.

The ROI of Relationships — Steve Farber and Patrick Lencioni on “Greater Than Yourself”

The first thing I noticed when I met Steve Farber were these linebacker shoulders that appeared as if they could support the world. Then he said, “Hello, let’s get breakfast,” and the smile in his eyes and voice made me think of Butch and Sundance saying in the old movie, “Who is this guy?”

Steve Farber had been someone I’d wanted to meet since the second I’d read both of books, The Radical Leap: A Personal Lesson in Extreme Leadership
and The Radical Edge: Stoke Your Business, Amp Your Life, and Change the World
back to back.

The charcters in his business fables, one particular named Agnes, had become people, friends to me. Agnes had sent me on a quest to identify that single value that wrapped up all my values into one. She called it “finding your frequency.”

Now Steve has a new book called Greater Than Yourself: The Ultimate Lesson of True Leadership. I’ve read that too and it’s set me on another quest how to change the world one person at a time through generosity of spirit and true leadership.

In this new fable Steve investigates the story of a note he found inside the case of a guitar he bought, He meets people who believe that raising others up above themselves is the greatest form leadership. It sounds simple: expand yourself, give yourself, replicate yourself. But the commitment to choose another person well, to offer over all you know and give access to is a huge and wonderful form of extreme leadership.

In the video below, Steve talks to Patrick Lencioni and Matthew Kelly — their story is told in the introduction to the book. You’ll find more about them and others on the Greater Than Yourself site.

Greater Than Yourself officially launches April 6th. It’s not only the fable, but also case stories and tools for starting your Greater Than Yourself project. Check it out.

Steve will be stopping in at SOBCon this year. I can’t wait to see him. I’ve already started working on my Greater Than Yourself Project. You can learn how to start yours by reading this book.

Register for SOBCon09 NOW!!

Experience the ROI of Relationships

The ROI of Relationships: David Bullock Talks with Jay Deragon

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The theme of SOBCon09 is the ROI of Relationships. To underscore the importance of relationships in business and to have a chance to make and celebrate a few while we’re doing that, I’ve opened up this series by successful and outstanding bloggers like you.

The ROI of Relationships — David Bullock with Guest Jay Deragon

Until they heard him speak at SOBCon08, people thought David Bullock was the SEO guy I brought in to teach them about analytics. He changed their minds and their hearts by showing that analytics is about relationships with people. Listen in to what he’s doing now.

David will be back at SOBCon09. Can’t wait to see him there!

David Bullock explains the analytics and intelligence of social media at DavidBullock.com and now at Social Media Connection.com His Twitter name is: @DavidBullock

Register for SOBCon09 NOW!!

Experience the ROI of Relationships