Successful Blog

Where to Turn When Twitter Trust Isn't Conversation Enough?

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relationships button

Twitter Talk

I’m a fan of Twitter. Nothing beats it for quick, agile, and brief. Twitter is the king of networking at the Internet speed and reach. Want to share something? Want to get a quick problem solved? Twitter lets us tap into our linked networks and pass information along, but you can’t send a Tweet to someone who’s never signed on.
Twitter Talk is great for a fast moving volley around a narrow idea or collecting the opinions of a crowd. But the very speed and compactness keeps the rich and telling details out — the details that explain why and how. If an idea or a problem takes exploring or discussion, Twitter doesn’t measure up.

As much as we can trust that what folks send us publicly through Twitter is likely to be the truth — as they know it sometimes 140 characters isn’t deep or wide enough. And that’s something important to recognize.

If I’ve made assumptions about you, the message I receive won’t be the one that you sent. If we use language differently our communication can go woefully wrong.

Sometimes whole conversations are important

to get something done.
to clearly state a position.
to define a project and outline expectations.
to participate in a negotiation.
to coax, cajole, or romance.

and in many other situations.

I won’t marry you, buy a house, or sign a fine deal for a job based on your tweets. I hope you won’t either. Twitter comes with an inherent lack of depth that isn’t concrete and won’t stand by me.

Twitter doesn’t do whole conversations well. Trust interactions require more than 140 characters. Trust goes deeper and grows much broader. Twitter isn’t enough to inspire trust.

Where do you go when Twitter needs to change to a whole conversation?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!

Buy the ebook. Learn the art of online conversation.

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What Is Trust?

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That Was the Question

Some of you will click away before you read this — for whatever reason — we can’t invest in every message offered us or every person who brings it. For those who stay, thank you.

About a week ago, I spent time with someone I’ve known since I was 7. By the time one day had turned well into the next, we had caught up our lives and were well into our thoughts. Our friendship has lasted a life-time and we share in both silence and conversation. Picture two introverts not concerned with sharing thoughts aloud … a no-filter conversation.

In that amazing context, she looked me in the eyes to ask, “What is trust?”

That question is still with me.

Trust Is the Conversation

About a week before I sat with my life-long friend, I watched world leaders discuss how to get the world turning properly after we’ve undone so many things. Each speaker brought a message and each listener could choose whether to trust what he or she said. Trust, candor, and truth were common themes.

Trust has become the conversation. We talk about it with family, friends, business partners, clients, and journalists … online and offline. Seems reasonable that world leaders might talk about it too.

We’re defining it, outlining it, and promoting it to each other, but the how to seems less than firmly drawn. As I watch and listen I become more aware of what moves me to trust and what undermines that.

What Trust Is Not

I’ve never been one to trust or distrust power — the power of print, the power of a microphone, the power of office, the power of your signature on my paycheck. I am surprised and sometimes frightened by those who are.

Trust is a relationship not an office. It’s not situational.
Power and position get an opportunity, the same opportunity as anyone, not a better one. Politicians might even get less.

Trust is not good deeds, good looks, or the right t-shirt. Context helps, but doesn’t guarantee it. If you come in a context I trust, I listen more easily. If some way you look like me or sound like me, I might offer trust more easily. Still the trappings don’t make the real thing. My decision to trust you does.

And trust isn’t unilateral or blind. One-way trust is a handing over of power. Blind trust goes against self-preservation.

What Is Trust?

Trust is a decision, a commitment, a pact and a bond that builds and connects. Trust is shared values. Trust empowers by the questions it removes.

Trust is brave and vulnerable. Trust is not sparing my feelings. Trust is the hard truth spoken gently.

Trust is knowing and believing, giving and receiving without hesitation. Trust is not wondering whether what I say is true, whether I will follow through, whether my thoughts and feelings will change when I’m talking to someone other. Trust is knowing you are safely invested and protected.

We can lose it before we have it or find where we least expect it. Trust can be given, but not invented, stolen, or demanded.

Trust is a delicate sculpture we build through relationship, communication, thoughts, and behaviors. Once it’s shattered we can’t glue it back together. The only replacement is remaking the sculpture. Like wellness, generosity, or kindness, we’re most reminded of its value when it’s gone.

In the end trust is knowing you are the same when I’m not there … Trust is keeping promises, even the unspoken promises. Not every trust relationship is that of two life-long friends who communicate with or without words. But imagine if that were so.

Trust is a risk, venture capital. It’s a gamble with a friend, a lover, or a business. Trust is us leading and leaning on each other when the outcome isn’t clear.

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When I don’t ask, when I’m not present, when I don’t even know that your actions might have been different,

when the reality is consistently …

I bet on you and I won.

trust is.

What is trust … to you?

–ME “Liz” Strauss

Order Anything You Put Your Mind To by Liz Strauss today!

SOB Business Cafe 10-16-09

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SB Cafe

Welcome to the SOB Cafe

We offer the best in thinking — articles, books, podcasts, and videos about business online written by the Successful and Outstanding Bloggers of Successful Blog. Click on the titles to enjoy each selection.

The Specials this Week are some of the SOBs of BlogWorldExpo

ChrisBrogan
To me, this is a large tapestry and we’re weaving the fabric of new stories together a little at a time. It’s okay if you don’t see it this way yet. I just want to share my perspective, if only to give you a fuzzy squint into what I believe is here, and what I think is coming with all this

Web Strategy
Whether you’re a professional speaker, company representative, or panelist at a conference, you must develop a social strategy during your speaking.

Copyblogger
As I said, the question headline is very powerful. When used properly, it creates an almost irresistible draw to prospective readers, no matter how busy they are.

altitude
When it comes to social business practices, some companies just seem like they’re made to tuck them right in and truck along, uniterrupted. Others have a harder time shifting the tide, and this whole social media thing has got them paralyzed and flustered and wondering what the hell they’re going to do.

Socialmedia.biz
While I think skepticism is in order, and the specifics of the government’s involvement need to be more clearly defined, in the end I believe the FTC’s move is a healthy and welcome development for social media.

The Bloggess
Sometimes when I’m on twitter I forget that I’m looking at the home page and I think I’m in reply mode and I’m looking at all these responses and I’m all “Oh my God, these people love me. Just look at all of these new responses” and then I look closer and I’m all “WTF?

Related ala carte selections include

Congratulations to Snippets of Life!

Sit back. Enjoy your read. Nachos and drinks will be right over. Stay as long as you like. No tips required. Comments appreciated.

–ME “Liz” Strauss

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How Do You Capture Your Irresistible Ideas?

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Be Irresistible Instead

Every great movie star did a movie or two for the cash until he or she could do the movies he or she really wanted to do. That’s one thing. It’s fine to do if we know that’s what we’re doing. It’s a skill-building, bill-paying short-term strategy that works to keep us solvent.

But, if we’re not careful, we can get so busy doing, that we lose sight of the end game — the strategic goal out there on the horizon. While we’re busy making money to pay the rent, we can have outstanding ideas and let them get away while we work at things that don’t inspire us.

Work without inspiration steals energy. It keeps us in the same place or moving in the wrong direction.

What powers and fuels a career or a business is irresistible, value-added, real WOW ideas — what folks need, wish, and dream for — can’t live without ideas. Even if you’re working on something that’s boring, are looking for your own irresistible ideas that will head you to your own horizon? Here’s how to know one …

  1. An irresistible idea addresses the practical and the emotional simultaneously. Think of a great car that makes you feel something when you drive it. Irresistible ideas appeal to the child and the adult in us.

    2. I bought my Toyota MR-2 Spyder for many reasons. It had great performance specs — practical. It has its flaws — 1.9 cubic feet of storage space. The WOW is the faux titanium door handles — emotional. No other car has them, not any Porsche, Ferrari, BMW two-seater. I know. I look inside them all. They all look boring to me. Those door handles make my car look like it cost 3 times what it cost. It will also allow me to resell it much higher. And the dealer was willing to sell and service it at a great price — it fit into my life.

    An irresistible idea fits easily into our lives. We don’t have to work to buy that product, to learn a lot use it, or to explain it when we share it with our friends. Irresitible save us time, saves us money, or gives us a sense of ease and comfort.

  2. Irresistible ideas are in the details, not in giant bells and whistles.

    3. Every car has an engine and four wheels. Trying to improve on those gets you into trying to be original. Original is risky and expensive. Why not piggyback on what has been tested and perfected. Irresistible ideas come in the back and the side doors. They approach things from the inside out. They make things work better, feel softer, stop being a pain. Irresistible takes one part and makes it elegantly simpler.

    Irresistible ideas are joyfully unexpected. I still love the person who invented the wireless mouse.

  3. Irresistible ideas are authentic. Spectacular ideas can’t be knocked off with the same effect, because they came from customer-centered thinking. Gotta be Apple to make the iPod. Gotta be Iain Dodsworth to make TweetDeck. I can’t build your event or product your way, because you are the special sauce that makes it just right.

The most irresistible ideas come from where your passion and your intelligence cross with the places you spend the most time. We have more ideas than we might actually realize and when we’re busy working on something tiring it’s easy to forget them.

How do you capture your irresistible ideas?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!

Buy the ebook. Learn the art of online conversation.

How to Enter the Social Media Space Gracefully

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Start by Learning the Culture

A few months ago, Jim McGee and I were talking about how businesses and individuals have different experiences upon first entering the social sphere. It wasn’t long before we were into the usual cocktail party analogy.

The problem seemed to be as simple as this.

Two people, both new to a group, attend a social gathering.

The first person is interested in who will be there. She dresses nicely with thoughts about the people attending and the venue — as she would for any event. She comes alone. Most folks don’t notice her entrance. She smiles when someone looks. As she walks over to say “hello” she trips on a loose rug. Someone who caught that friendly smile reaches down to help her up.

A nice person … We identify with her. We’d want help too.

The second attendee wants attention. She floodlights her walk as she enters dressed in sequins and stars. She’s followed by an entourage who are flashing cameras and opening doors. She’s noticed long before she trips.

Think about which person is likely to get helped up and which is likely to be left on her own.

To pull off stars and sequins in a social situation, you have to be friends with the folks you’re meeting. Shine the lights on yourself before people know you, they’re unlikely to see fun and clever. They’ll see disrespect or arrrogance.

Grace enters quietly reflecting light on everyone.

@comcastcares entered gracefully. You’ve probably seen example of folks who made their entrance with too much noise.

How would you counsel someone looking to enter social media gracefully?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

Have You Tried Letting the Other Guy See Why You're Invested?

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What If You Let Them See?

Change the World!

His name was Michael. He was all of six years old, and he had a crush on me. That was only right I was his first grade teacher and I had a crush on him and every other kid that sat in the classroom with him.

Michael was a beautiful, logical, and thoughtful young student who liked to help make things go the way they should. I was young enough to think I could control things.

Every time we’d go as a class to anywhere, Michael would somehow end up at the front of the line. At some moment he’d get about four feet ahead of me … I’d make a point of NOT telling him where we were going, but he’d still take the lead.

Some days that bothered me. I thought about what that meant about me, about what that meant about him. Why should I care about a six year old wandering ahead of me? But I did. I wanted to lead the line. It was as simple as that.

One day, I stopped the line. I got down on my knees and looked Michael in the eyes with as much gentleness as I could muster.

“Michael,” I said, “How old are you?”
He proudly replied. “I’m six years and 12 days old.”
I said, “Four years is a long, long time, isn’t it?”
He thought and replied, “Yes.” (Four years measured 2/3 of his life. I had him there.)
I quietly put forth this request. “Michael, you see, I went to college for four whole years so that I could lead the line. Would you let me lead the line?”
“Oh yes,” he answered.

He was generous in letting me lead the line from that moment forward. Sometimes solving a problem is as easy as letting the other guy why we’re invested in the outcome.

Have you tried letting the other guy see your investment?

We can change the world — just like that.
–ME “Liz” Strauss

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If you’re ready to change the world, send me your thoughts in a guest post. Feel free to take the gorgeous Change the World image up there that Sandy designed back to your blog. Or help yourself to this one.

Change the World!.

Email me about what you’re doing or what we might do. Let’s change the world one bit at a time together. Together it can’t take forever.